MeetRosalind Sedacca, CCT Rosalind Sedacca is an author, an award-winning professional speaker, and Certified Corporate Trainer specializing in both communication and relationship issues. She has facilitated workshops and seminars throughout North America on creating 'conscious' relationships for both singles and couples. Based on her own personal experience, she wrote How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook Guide to Preparing Your Children - with Love! This internationally acclaimed ebook provides an innovative new approach to breaking the divorce news to your children and setting the stage for positive parenting ahead. At Rosalind's Child-Centered Divorce Network parents will find resources and tools to help them create successful outcomes for the entire family in the months, years and decades to come.
"Rosalind's book is unique in that it offers parents an innovative approach to having that difficult and usually dreaded initial conversation with their children and making it as positive and supportive as possible. A parent contemplating a divorce would be well served by reading this valuable book."
Raoul Felder,Celebrity Divorce Attorney
"Rosalind's brilliant book's non-judgmental, compassionate and no-nonsense approach will resonate with all divorcing parents – even those with the most challenging relationships. It is a critical piece of the divorce puzzle, and a must read!"
Cynthia Tiano, Esq."I highly recommend this as more than a book, but a tool to assist children to more successfully navigate the disorientation and maze that comes as part of divorce."
C. Paul Wanio, Ph.D., LMFT, LMHC"This hands-on interactive storybook is a must for all parents going through a divorce. It is a step-by-step guide for appropriately including children in the process. No parent should leave their home without it!"
Sally Goldberg, PhDCenter for Successful Children
"Rosalind Sedacca has invaluable information to share with divorcing parents. There is no other book a couple needs to help them with the most difficult conversation a parent can have with a child, that their parents are getting divorced. You are VERY lucky to have found my partner in the peaceful divorce movement."
Belinda Rachman, Esq"Rosalind Sedacca has just improved the lives of countless children. I have practiced divorce law for 44 years and will attest to the importance of how children are introduced to their parents' divorce. How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? gives us something simple and sound to rely upon. There is absolutely no downside to Rosalind's storybook concept. It's all good and it beats anything else that I've come across. In fact, it's great and it is definitely something that the world has needed. The book is a winner and it is also a lifesaver."
J. Richard Kulerski, Esq"Rosalind Sedacca has made a monumental contribution to self-help resources in an area that affects the lives of millions of men, women and children. After 32 years of counseling people in various stages of uncoupling, I can testify to the urgent need of a "how to" guide for people contemplating divorce. This book offers them a "life preserver." I have already referred my patients to this material and have received great feedback. I cannot recommend this book highly enough."
Beverly Gibel, LCSW, ACSW, BCD"Rosalind Sedacca's 'How Do I Tell the Kids about the DIVORCE?' is a much needed breakthrough in the emotional minefield that parents traverse when they prepare their children for an impending divorce. The template, storybook strategy sends sensitive, kind, loving and safe messages which every child needs as they prepare for the scary unknown. I recommend her book for everyone who has children and is contemplating divorce."
Jack Singer, Ph.D.Licensed Clinical & Forensic Psychologist, LCSW, ACSW, BCD
July is Child-Centered Divorce Month
July has been designated National Child-Centered Divorce Month. This is a time for parents, therapists, attorneys, educators, clergy and other professionals to focus on the importance of putting children’s needs first and foremost when divorce or separation is pending.
Most of the negative consequences of divorce result from one or both parents making choices that are not in the best interest of their children. Frequently, parents are so caught up in their own emotional drama — in anger, resentment, frustration and sometimes outright hatred of their former spouse — that they make decisions based on
hurting, spiting or getting even. Too often, innocent children are caught up in a vicious tug of war, whether it be physical or emotional. They are asked to keep or share secrets, relay messages, make choices about who they like best, and sometimes are even kept from contact with the other parent. Parents who do this are giving little thought as to how their behavior affects their child’s self-esteem, security and long-term view of the world.
Caught in situations in which they cannot safely confide in their parents, these children are forced to “grow up” far too soon. Some may recede into themselves and put up a wall that mistrusts “outsiders.” Others may act out and become bullies, gang members, or other behavior challenges. Still others may become depressed or angry and lose the joyful innocence of childhood.
Regardless of how they handle parental dysfunction during and after the divorce process, these children all deserve better. They deserve to know that none of this is their fault. They deserve to know that both Mom and Dad still love them — and always will. They deserve to know that, despite the changes in their life, they will still be okay. Mom and Dad are handling things with their children’s best interest at heart. Putting them first. Remembering that regardless of divorce, they will always be the parents of these precious children — and should put that awareness above all else.
I encourage professionals who counsel divorcing families to celebrate National Child-Centered Divorce Month by writing articles, offering seminars, sending press releases and reaching out in their communities with a strong message. Spread the word that when parents divorce, your children need you more than ever. Don’t let them down.
Rosalind Sedacca’s new ebook, How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook(tm) Guide to Preparing Your Children — with Love! is now available online at http://www.howdoitellthekids.com. She also offers a complimentary ezine at her website, http://www.childcentereddivorce.com for families experiencing divorce or separation. Rosalind can be reached at Rosalind@childcentereddivorce.com.
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Thank you, Rosalind, for your amazing insight into this very difficult subject. After buying your book and convincing my wife to read it with me, we realized that our children needed to be placed at the head of the line. We followed your roadmap, filled in the blanks in your story book with our story and presented it to our kids, aged 9 and 12. Despite the fact that our family is breaking up after 16 years of marriage, our children understand theat they are loved by both parents, that they will always be our children and have a much better understanding of human dynamics and the hows and whys of a broken marriage. We all feel better, we’re all getting along and the process is moving along smoothly.
Thank you so much for your good work and much success with your book.
TW, South Florida
I’m going thru a divorce and have 4 children. Three of them are from my ex-husband. He was seeing them every other weekend and now he only sees them when he wants to. But now that he does not have a driver’s liscense he can’t drive to pick them up and he won’t give me his address to drop them off. He hasn’t paid child support in a year since he left. What should I do?
First, you need to get sound legal advice regarding child-support payments.
If you’re in phone contact with him, find out if he still cares about maintaining his relationship with the children? Explain to him their perspective about not seeing their Dad. Use emotional language to convey their hurt, disappointment and insecurity when Dad is no longer consistently in their lives. Encourage him to use email communication and phone calls with the children on a frequent basis.
You may need coaching services or a support group to help you through this once you understand what his intentions are and the motivation behind his behavior.
Never give up. Keep your communication always focused on the children. Don’t put him on the defensive. Just remind him of how much he means to the kids. Happy to provide telephone coaching if you desire.
Best wishes to you.
Rosalind