Depression In Children of Divorce – Help

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Remember the emotional toll of divorce on children Divorce has many effects on children. No two children will react in exactly the same way. That’s why parents need to be diligent about watching for signs and indications that your child may be having problems coping with their new reality. Depression is one of the more common reactions we see in children of divorce. Unfortunately, many parents entirely miss or misinterpret the signs of depression. It can take many forms including behavior that is distancing, lethargic and withdrawn. This is often accompanied by a drop in school grades. But depression can also show in other ways, such as agitation, frustration and aggression. When depression takes that form, parents are likely to think of it in terms of discipline problems and respond with punishment. It takes maturity and a broader perspective to stand back

Parenting After Divorce

Divorced Parents: When You Make Co-Parenting Mistakes, Step Up & Make It Right!

Anger-Conflict Programs for Co-Parenting & Other Life Challenges By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce drives some people crazy. Because of that, they make many poor decisions. Their judgment, integrity and credibility are easy to question. Their decisions regarding taking responsibility for their children come under scrutiny. There is much we can all learn from these mistakes. And wisdom we can take away that is important for all of us to remember: It’s never too late to get it right – when your children are at stake! In the heat of the divorce drama, we may have settled for a decision or two that we later regretted and still feel resentful. Or we made a child-related agreement that, in hindsight, was not in our child’s best interest – but we don’t know quite how to remedy the situation. Perhaps we lost our tempers at an inappropriate time and

Parenting After Divorce

Divorcing Moms: Love Your Kids More Than Hating the “Other Woman”!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC parenting after divorce When the “other woman” is in the picture, divorce can be vastly more complicated for divorcing parents. But the challenges that can come with the "other woman” don't change the parenting rules. When you’re a parent it is essential that you don’t make the big “never do” mistakes when talking to your children – as tempting as it may be to do otherwise. These “no-no” mistakes include: Sharing adult information with your kids, even teens. Don’t bring up the OW unless the children already know about her. Don’t discuss adultery and other complex adult issues, despite the hurt and pain you’re experiencing at this time. Instead, reach out to a therapist or divorce coach for professional help and support. Confide in your friends – not your kids! As tempting as it may be, minimize the conversations about the why

Parenting After Divorce

Children Going Through Divorce: How Parents Can Meet Their Emotional Needs

the emotional toll of divorce on children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC A child's psychological needs are greatly increased during and after a divorce. Often they are experiencing an economic and emotional roller coaster, which can lead to guilt, fear and confusion. If parents are consciously focused on and sensitive to their child's needs through divorce and its aftermath, they will do a better job of meeting those needs in the weeks, months and years ahead. At this time it’s important that both parents strive to minimize the price your child has to pay for the breakup of your relationship. To do this effectively it’s important to understand some of your child’s most significant emotional and psychological needs: Approval and Acceptance: This will be a child's greatest need because their sense of self is very likely in a fragile state, especially if they have been exposed to

Parenting After Divorce

7 Steps To Forgiving Your Ex Once and For All

Forgiveness is the gift you give yourself so you can move on to healthier relationships By Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW Forgiving others and yourself is infinitely terrifying yet necessary for achieving healthy relationships. It’s about being willing to acknowledge that you are capable of being wounded and able to risk exposing yourself. It also means that you’re stepping out of the role of a victim and taking charge of your life. Forgiveness is one of the most misunderstood concepts, yet people often express clichés such as “forgive and forget” as if it’s an easy process. However, the importance of forgiveness takes on a new meaning after divorce because no one marries with the intent of divorcing so hurt and shame can run deep. At times people equate forgiveness with weakness and it’s also widely believed that if you forgive someone you’re condoning their behavior. In my case,

Guest Experts

How Divorce Affects Children & Teens: Parents Need Realistic Expectations!

Children are affected by divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parenting is always complex. Parenting following a divorce can add many other layers of distraction and confusion to the mix. That makes it even more important for parents to be aware of how their children are responding to the divorce. Misunderstanding Your Child’s Intentions One common error parents make is misunderstanding the stage of development their children are at which can lead to unrealistic expectations. Too often parents will assume that their child has a realistic handle on their emotions. They also believe the child has a deeper understanding of human nature than is really possible at their age. So when their child acts out, expresses anger or otherwise misbehaves, many parents misconstrue their intentions. Parents don’t fully grasp the fear and insecurity that divorce brings up in children. They mistakenly see these young beings as little

Parenting After Divorce

Divorce Advice From Family & Friends – Don’t Take It!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC The Divorce/Separation Path Divorce by its very nature brings up lots of judgments. Most people have strong opinions about divorce, strongly influenced by their own experiences or the programming of their upbringing. You’re very unlikely to change anyone’s mind about the best way to handle divorce when you’re a parent. So don’t try. Your family and friends mean well. They want to support and help you through any crisis. But be aware that along with their support they bring their personal prejudices. These are weighed down by the baggage of judgments that inevitably color their advice. If you allow yourself to be influenced by the well-meant suggestions of these individuals, you may find yourself falling into a deep quagmire of confusion or even depression. No one walks in your shoes or has experienced your history. At the same time, most

Child-Centered Divorce

8 Tips For Co-Parenting Success After Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parenting following a divorce can be complex, frustrating and confusing. However, every day parents around the world are coping with the challenges and raising happy, well-adjusted children. As founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network I’ve found that there are many factors that influence your effectiveness as a co-parent. They begin from the inside out. In this article we’ll review some of the major keys to insuring a more successful co-parenting outcome for you and your children during and long after your divorce. Co-parenting is a life-long endeavor. When you master the skills suggested here, life will be better and more rewarding for everyone in the family. And that’s a goal worth attaining! 1: WATCH YOUR ATTITUDE Attitude plays a big part in the success of any Child-Centered Divorce. If you approach your divorce with a commitment to making it as positive an experience as possible for

Parenting After Divorce

4 Ways to Help Kids of Divorce Transition Between Homes

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During divorce proceedings parenting plans and contact schedules are usually established to create a semblance of routine in this new chapter of family life. I am a strong believer in co-parenting whenever possible to serve the best interest of your children. Sometimes parallel parenting is the norm, meaning you both parent the children but with minimum communication between parents. Keep in mind that your kids pick up on the emotional energy around their parents and life after divorce is smoother and easier for them when their parents behave with civility and maturity. However you work out your shared parenting plan, it’s the reality of post-divorce daily life that puts co-parents to the test. Here are 4 ways to ease the process for everyone involved. 1. Be patient with one another. Starting any new schedule in life is never easy. Chances are the between-home transitions will present

Parenting After Divorce

Divorcing Parents: Avoid Taking Your Divorce Drama To Court

By Rosalind Sedacca, CD C divorce consequences for families You’re getting divorced. It’s likely that one or both of you are angry, resentful, hurt, vindictive or any combination of other painful emotions. You want to lash out, to get back at your spouse or boost your own sense of esteem. Hiring the most aggressive litigious divorce lawyer you can find may seem like your smartest choice. Your ex is in for a fight! If you’re a parent who is thinking along those lines, you’re making a decision you may long regret. And so will your innocent children. If you choose a lawyer who directs you straight into a vicious court battle, the costs to you can be insurmountable – not only in financial outlay, but in emotional turmoil as well. Think long and hard before you move your divorce battle into the litigation system. It is

Child-Centered Divorce

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Depression In Children of Divorce – Help

Divorced Parents: When You Make Co-Paren...

Divorcing Moms: Love Your Kids More Than...

Children Going Through Divorce: How Pare...

7 Steps To Forgiving Your Ex Once and Fo...

How Divorce Affects Children & Teens: Pa

Divorce Advice From Family & Friends – D

8 Tips For Co-Parenting Success After Di...

4 Ways to Help Kids of Divorce Transitio...

Divorcing Parents: Avoid Taking Your Div...

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