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Child Centered Divorce

The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent

Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

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Parental Divorces During School: Easing ...

Parental Divorces During School: Easing The Way For Children
Divorce catches kids in the middle By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  While many families time their separation or divorce for the summer months to   take advantage of the school break, many other families initiate the divorce decision in the midst of the school year. January is one of the most common months to start the process. There are several reasons why this sometimes becomes a necessity. Many couples considering splitting decide to wait until after the holidays to break the news to their children. Others wait to take advantage of year-end job bonuses so they’ll have the extra funds to cover attorney, moving and other related expenses. Still others are faced with unexpected circumstances that accelerate the decision to divorce. Regardless, it’s not the why that should be concerning us at this time – it’s the how. How are we as parents going to approach this separation or

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Divorcing Parents – Think Twice Before G

Divorcing Parents – Think Twice Before Going to Court
Parents Fighting Around Kids After Divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When famous celebrities like Mel Gibson, Denise Richards, Halle Berry and others battle through a divorce, the stakes are high. Millions of dollars are often in contention, blurring issues related to child-custody and visitation. These couples hire killer attorneys and commit to paying an enormous price -- which includes not only hefty legal fees, but a tremendous time expenditure and emotional toll. Too many non-celebrity couples facing divorce blindly choose this same path - often without considering the reality of all the costs involved. They do not have the revenue to maintain ongoing litigation in the courts. Nor do they have a game plan for putting together the pieces of their shattered family after the legal battles are finally over. Sadly they come to realize that celebrities are usually poor role models. They don't necessarily make

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How To Handle An Uncooperative Ex During...

How To Handle An Uncooperative Ex During Divorce Co-Parenting
Children affected by Divorce Co-parenting after divorce is never easy. This is especially true when you have a contentious relationship or if your ex-partner is not cooperative. You will be subject to a tremendous amount of stress about your ex-spouse’s parenting skills, as well as the financial needs of your child. Dealing with divorce is hard as it is; throwing the challenges of co-parenting into the mix will make it extra hard. What Is Co-Parenting? Co-parenting is a unique arrangement between two ex-spouses who have a child together. When you go through a divorce, one is left to gain custody of the child. Regardless of who has custody of the child, both parties are responsible for caring for and providing for the needs of the child or children. In a normal situation, both parents are expected to play an active role in the development and growth

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Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays...

Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays Can Be Especially Tough!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Are you facing alone time without the kids this holiday season? Often that’s one of the saddest consequences of divorce when you’re a parent. What do you do when your children are visiting their other parent? While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome break for an overscheduled single parent, for others the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. It can be particularly challenging when your friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. Don’t sink into despair. It’s really important at this time to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This can become an ideal time to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding new people, activities and events that bring joy into your life. Among the greatest challenges for divorced parents is avoiding self-pity. When you’re overwhelmed by

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Shared Parenting & Child Custody – Put D

Shared Parenting & Child Custody – Put Down the Boxing Gloves
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When divorced parents let the negative emotions they're feeling toward their former spouses - hatred, hurt, disappointment, guilt, shame, anxiety, frustration, mistrust and more - influence their decisions about child-custody issues, they are sabotaging their children. It is selfish, insensitive and extremely unproductive to let your personal vendetta determine the relationship your children have with their other parent – and extended family on both sides. Throughout the U.S. and the world divorce professionals are talking about proposed changes to child custody legislation. Investigative committees are being formed and new legislation is being considered about whether shared parenting may be the best custodial situation for all children of divorcing parents. While I am a strong advocate of shared parenting - it worked very successfully for me - I do not believe it's the right or only answer for everyone. Because every situation is different when it comes

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Are Your Kids Paying The Price For Your ...

Are Your Kids Paying The Price For Your Difficult Divorce? How Not To Sabotage Your Divorce For the Sake of the Kids!
Parents Fighting Around Kids After Divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Most people believe belive that it’s divorce itself that scars children. But the real truth is HOW PARENTS HANDLE THE DIVORCE IS WHAT DOES THE MOST DAMAGE!  Know that, I faced a lot of skepticism, from both the media and from parents, when I started my work as Founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network.  There were gender battles between mothers and fathers – each side accusing the other of being damaging to the wellbeing of the children.  There were sweeping generalizations about the impact of divorce on children – with cultural and religious contention that divorce was bad and staying together for the sake of the kids was somehow morally superior!  I fought those battels on TV, radio, blogs, magazine articles and social media – and slowly found support and strong endorsements from experts around the

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Shared Parenting v. Equal Parenting: 5 W...

Shared Parenting v. Equal Parenting: 5 Ways the New Laws Will Hurt Kids
Guest Post by Karen Covey Children affected by Divorce The story is all too familiar. The kids stand on the front steps, consumed by sadness. They watch their father walk toward the car. Silent tears roll down their cheeks while their dad gets in the car and drives away. As soon as he’s out of view, he chokes up and pulls over. He doesn’t want to lose his kids. But shared parenting seems like an impossible dream. It’s scenes like this one that have fueled the Father’s Rights movement. Over the past few decades, Father’s Rights advocates have slowly been chipping away at the assumption that mothers should always have sole custody of the kids in divorce. For years, fathers have been fighting to have an equal say in how their kids are raised. They have fought to get more time with their kids. Now, they’re

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Why YOU Should Resolve Child-Related Di...

Why YOU Should Resolve  Child-Related Divorce Disputes – Not a Judge!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Family-focused divorce attorney Larry Sarezky is passionate about keeping parents out of court when handling disputes over child custody. Based on decades of experience Larry knows that long-term outcomes work out better when the decisions are made by the parents themselves rather than left to the legal system. Most parents continue to co-parent their children after divorce. Except for circumstances where children are at risk, Larry strongly emphasizes that parents have the responsibility to put the their children first by working out a parenting plan that is in the children’s best interests. Larry’s message: If you are unable to resolve children’s issues with your co-parent, a judge will. There are some very good reasons to avoid that: The custody evaluation process can humiliate, frighten and compromise your children, and cause them enduring emotional harm. Custody cases are tremendously expensive. Parents must not only pay their own

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Is It Divorce – Or Parental Conflict – T

Is It Divorce – Or Parental Conflict – That Most Damages Children?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce catches kids in the middle So often I am asked: Is it divorce or parental discord that most damages children? More and more evidence points at the attitude of the parents being most influential on the outcome for innocent children. Many studies I've read about over the past decade all come to the agreement that children are more negatively impacted by parental conflict than by divorce itself.  Numerous articles by marriage and family therapist Ruth Bettelheim address this topic in ways that are both relevant and, quite surprising for many. That’s because she refutes common misconceptions about divorce and addresses the real issues of concern. According to Bettelheim, “Studies conducted in the past 20 years have shown that on all meaningful measures of success -- social, economic, intellectual and psychological -- most adult children from divorced families are no worse off

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5 Reasons Why Bad Marriages are Worse fo...

5 Reasons Why Bad Marriages are Worse for Kids Than Divorce
Staying together for the kids. Is this a selfless gesture that puts your children first, or is it more damaging to your child’s psyche than if you were to separate? Here’s a piece of divorce advice: staying together for the children isn’t always noble. Your marriage is the first example of love and partnership that your kids see, and how you treat your partner plays an important role in how your child views relationships in the future. This means if your relationship is healthy, your child will grow up with a great view of partnership. But if your relationship is troubled, it may do harm to their emotional and mental wellbeing. Are you staying in your marriage for the benefit of your children? Here are 5 reasons why bad marriages are worse for kids than divorce. Constant Tension and Unease  Many parents want to stay in their unhappy marriages for

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