Skip to main content

Child Centered Divorce

The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent

Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

Slider

Blog

Disciplining Children Through Divorce By...

Disciplining Children Through Divorce By Limiting Behavior — Not Their Thoughts!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Discipline is always a challenge for parents. Regardless of the age your child may be, they inevitably find ways to act out, challenge your authority and test the limits of their boundaries. Often these behaviors create tension and disagreements between both parents which children are good at exploiting to their advantage. This, of course, is the time for parents to forge a solid bond of agreement regarding their approach to discipline. If they do, the child is less likely to test the waters and more likely to alter their behavior into more appropriate channels. When separation or divorce takes place, disciplining children can become even more difficult. This is especially so if both parents are not on good terms regarding the parenting equation. Parental discord can open the door for children to move into behavioral extremes, pitting you and your former spouse against each other. We've

Read More

Divorced Parents: Made Mistakes You Regr...

Divorced Parents: Made Mistakes You Regret? It’s Not Too Late To Make It Right!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce drives some people crazy. Because of that, divorced co-parents often make many poor decisions. Their judgment, integrity and behavior are easy to question. Their decisions regarding taking responsibility for their children come under scrutiny. There is much we can all learn from these mistakes as co-parents. And wisdom we can take away that is important for all of us to remember: It’s never too late to get it right – when your children are at stake! We all have regrets … In the heat of the divorce drama, we may have settled for a decision or two that we later regretted and still feel resentful. Or we made a child-related agreement that, in hindsight, was not in our child’s best interest – but we don’t know quite how to remedy the situation. Perhaps we lost our tempers at an inappropriate time and watched our children

Read More

Divorced Parents: Don’t Let Your Childre

Divorced Parents: Don’t Let Your Children Start Parenting You!
Divorce catches kids in the middle By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce is tough enough. When children try to protect their parents by parenting their parents, the parenting is moving backwards and the results are devastating. Always be careful of what you share with your children regarding your own emotional state during and after your divorce. It can create enormous confusion for your children, along with guilt, frustration and despair. Children can be very resourceful in how they behave when they sense either one of their parents is vulnerable or hurting. Often they will side with one parent over the other as a means of support. They may fear that expressing happiness about time spent with one parent can seem like a betrayal of the other. They worry about hurting the feelings of the emotionally weaker parent – or experiencing the disapproval of the emotionally stronger parent.

Read More

5 Divorce Co-Parenting Questions Your Ki...

5 Divorce Co-Parenting Questions Your Kids Want You To Explore
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Co-parenting brings enormous challenges to both parents. For those not caught in high conflict divorces, it’s easier to move into the co-parenting equation. And much easier to adapt to new schedules, boundaries, agreements and conversations. That’s why the Child-Centered Divorce Network so strongly endorses mediation, Collaborative Divorce, the new Amicable Divorce Network and similar low-conflict options. They keep both parents focused on what really matters long-term: the emotional, physical and psychological well-being of your children! When one gets entangled in the complications of litigation, you are opening the door to court involvement in your family dynamics. This is rarely a healthy situation for parents or children. No judge, regardless of how well-meaning they may be, knows your family the way you do. Their decisions are binding. That may lead you to countless  appearances over many years trying to untangle a decision that didn’t need to be

Read More

Co-Parenting with Someone Who is Narciss...

Co-Parenting with Someone Who is Narcissistic or Challenging
Guest Post from Terry Gaspard At its best, co-parenting is a wonderful opportunity for children of divorce to have close to equal access to both parents – to feel it is okay to love both of their parents. Experts agree that the outcomes for children of divorce improve when they have positive bonds with both parents. These include better psychological and behavioral adjustment, and enhanced academic performance. However, few experts discuss the drawbacks of co-parenting when one parent is hands-off, has a high conflict personality; or a personality disorder such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder. What is the solution for parents who want to co-parent with an ex who is narcissistic or challenging? According to Dr. Edward Kruk, Ph.D., “Parallel Parenting is an arrangement in which divorced parents are able to co-parent by means of disengaging from each other, and having limited contact, in situations where they have demonstrated that they

Read More

Divorced? 4 Valuable Life Lessons You Ca...

Divorced? 4 Valuable Life Lessons You Can Master!
Cooperative coparenting supports children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce affects everyone differently. Its impact also lingers with us for different periods of time. But there’s one thing that never changes: the aftermath of divorce can be a sense of self-discovery.  Or it can become an internment in a self-made prison of depression and resentment. What influences us the most is how well we accept what is and our determination to use the divorce as a pathway to a new and better life. The good news: it’s all up to us. We can create an attitude of positive expectation. Or we can subjugate ourselves to months and years of self-pity and despair down the road. The bad news: it’s not always easy to change our attitude or perspective on life. But if you do, you’ll be rewarded with a happier future for yourself as well as your

Read More

6 Tips For Talking To Your Kids After Di...

6 Tips For Talking To Your Kids After Divorce!
Divorced parent communication with your child is essential. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When you’re a divorced parent, effective communication with your children is more important than ever. Which means honing your communication skills so you’re connecting with love, respect and compassion. Candid divorced parent communication opens the doors to a healthier, more positive relationship with your kids. It makes you more sensitive to issues of concern early on so you can nip them in the bud. It encourages your children to talk about what they are feeling. It addresses their questions and situations that are creating conflict for them. How to open the conversation so you’re not shut down! Don’t sit down and say, let’s talk. Find comfortable times and places where conversation can flow naturally and easily. Then bring up related subjects in a casual way. Watching TV or movies at home can often be

Read More

5 Ways To Minimize How Divorce Impacts Y...

5 Ways To Minimize How Divorce Impacts Your Children
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Communication with your children is always important But never as essential as when they are impacted by separation or divorce. Children are vulnerable and easily frightened by changes in their routines. The more you talk to and comfort them, the less stress and anxiety they’ll experience. This is the time to reassure your children that you are taking care of matters. To remind them that everyone in the family will be okay. Then, of course, take responsibility for doing what needs to be done to assure their well-being. Here are five important ways you can minimize the impact of divorce on your children to help them thrive during and after your divorce. 1.  Strive for normalcy and routine: It's important to keep as much normalcy in your children’s lives as is feasible. Maintaining relationships with friends and neighbors provides a sense of stability and continuity. Keeping

Read More

9 Ways Divorcing Parents Can Support The...

9 Ways Divorcing Parents Can Support Their Kids With Love
Cooperative coparenting supports children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC As a divorcing parent are you worried about your kids? Most parents share a deep love for their children – along with the desire to protect them from emotional or physical harm. However, when the sanctity of the marriage is disrupted by divorce, things can dramatically change. Divorcing parents don’t always know how to give kids the support they need. Caught up in their own anger and hurt, it’s tempting to lash out, get back at their former partner, and take revenge. Too often, the children are caught in a parental power struggle. Collateral damage when parents vent their frustration or rage. The outcome is painful for everyone in the family! Children crave and need their parent’s support So how can you support your children and parent them effectively throughout this challenging time? And how can you co-parent

Read More

5 Steps To A Healthy Divorce Mindset Dur...

5 Steps To A Healthy Divorce Mindset During A Pandemic!
co-parenting can be challenging during a pandemic By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce can stop us in our tracks and overwhelm anyone with anxiety, sadness and   depression. This is especially true for parents who have the added responsibility of caring for innocent children. Now we are confronted by an additional challenge: coping with divorce during a pandemic health crisis. And it’s up to us to create a positive mindset not only for ourselves, but for our children as well. Here are 5 important keys to keeping a positive perspective during these tough times. Monitor your thoughts and beliefs. Yes, we’re all beyond tired of this pandemic. But coping skills are all we have to keep us safe and sane! What we tell ourselves influences how we feel and how we treat others. Catch yourself if you’re falling into a blame game about how belligerent your former spouse

Read More