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Child Centered Divorce

The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent

Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

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Damaging Things Parents Do That Harm Chi...

Damaging Things Parents Do That Harm Children During Divorce and Why!
By Sean Smallwood, Esq. Over the last decade in my practice as a family law and divorce attorney I have seen and litigated just about every type of custody issue that you can imagine. I have seen allegations of domestic violence, substance abuse, sexual molestation, and even attempted murder, however, the thing that that appalls me the most is the utter disregard that so many divorcing parents have for the permanent emotional damage that they cause to their children by their behavior during divorce. Many have said that when two people are going through a life altering event such as divorce that their personalities change and their brain starts working in a way that is uncharacteristic of their normal function. In my experience, I believe this to be very true. I prefer to call it temporary insanity. With all of the emotional angles of a divorce such as betrayal, jealousy,

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Co-Parenting Is Not A Competition. Don’t

Co-Parenting Is Not A Competition. Don’t Play To Win!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Co-parenting your children after divorce should never be a competition between parents. It’s not a game and there should be no winners, except for the kids! Nor should there be any losers, because that’s a loss for the kids, as well. Co-parenting is all about mind-set. How you approach it. What your goals are … and how you play day by day. Competition creates toxic parenting Competing co-parents put their children in an awkward situation. Kids are cajoled, manipulated or even bullied into feeling they have to choose sides. It’s hurtful, damaging and insensitive to subject them to that emotional turmoil, even when subtle. Steer clear of the “good parent/bad parent” mentality. You’re both in this together – for your lifetime! Think CO-PARENTS in the most positive possible way. Co-parent to fit your unique family Co-parenting can be enormously challenging. There are no rules for how

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Secrets Of Co-Parenting Effectively Desp...

Secrets Of Co-Parenting Effectively Despite Post-Divorce Challenges
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC As a Divorce & Parenting Coach I’m often asked “What are the secrets to successful co-parenting after divorce?” That’s the million-dollar question. And while there is no simple answer, I believe most professionals will agree the smartest strategy is learning how to co-parent respectfully. That means remove anger, hostility or vindictiveness from your interactions with your former spouse and learn how to share co-parenting as loving parents to your kids. Of course, that’s not always easy to do. But it is doable. Learning to master effective  communication skills, showing empathy and finding areas of agreement whenever possible go a long way towards diffusing tensions and cooperating as parents. The benefits you derive can be substantial. They will more than make up for the ego gratification you get when holding on to those damaging emotions. Remember, your goal is not to re-establish your adult relationship. It’s to

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3 Lessons From MARRIAGE STORY Movie Of V...

3 Lessons From MARRIAGE STORY Movie Of Value  For Every Divorcing Parent!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Because divorce is such a complex life experience it’s rare to find it realistically portrayed in film, TV or theater. Too often we see over the top drama, unrealistic circumstances or vindictive escalations more motivated by viewer ratings than thoughtful, meaningful dialogue. Surprisingly, the Netflix original movie, Marriage Story, is an excellently portrayed divorce story. It stands apart for addressing parental divorce with jarring authenticity. The beautifully written, emotionally compelling script focuses on a believable family. Both parents are facing universal challenges that escalate in understandable, organic ways. The stellar celebrity cast play their characters with nuanced sensitivity. We recognize their confusion. We relate to their pain. We resonate with their decisions and all the known and unseen consequences that emerge every step of the way. The film begins with both partners putting together a list of what they liked and appreciated most about their spouse.

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How Child-Centered Divorce Month Can Tra...

How Child-Centered Divorce Month Can Transform Your Life!
An interview with Rosalind Sedacca, CDC www.DivorcedParentSupport.com January is International Child-Centered Divorce Month What is International Child-Centered Divorce Month? This January is the 13th Anniversary of Child-Centered Divorce Month. Its purpose is to support divorcing and divorced parents in coping with the effects of divorce on children. Equally important, it helps parents prevent emotional and psychological damage to children during and after a divorce. In recognition of International Child-Centered Divorce Month 2020 divorce experts around the world will be providing free ebooks, video webinars, coaching services, e-courses and other gifts to divorcing and divorced or separated parents throughout January.   Why commemorate ICCD Month every January? More divorces get initiated in January, following the holiday season, than in any other month. That’s why as a Divorce & Parenting Coach and founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network, I chose January to commemorate International Child-Centered Divorce Month every year.

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4 Sane Steps To Overcoming Guilt During ...

4 Sane Steps To Overcoming Guilt During and After Divorce!
Divorce catches kids in the middle By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce brings up a broad array of painful emotions including anger, fear, resentment and hurt. And when you’re a parent, guilt can surface among your most dominant feelings. For loving parents, guilt can be an incredibly powerful emotion. That’s because divorce triggers our basic beliefs on parenting rules and conduct. Usually when you experience guilt you are feeling bad about a previous action, thought or feeling that you perceive to be wrong. When you cannot let that go you can experience tremendous guilt. While everyone feels guilty at some time in their life, divorce pushes the guilt button in dramatic ways. And some people are more susceptible. Often those with low self-esteem, tendencies towards perfectionism, the need to be in control or who have  difficulty letting go of anger are more riddled by guilt. Because divorce is such an

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Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays...

Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays Is Especially Tough!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Are you facing alone time without the kids this holiday season? Often that’s one of the saddest consequences of divorce when you’re a parent. What do you do when your children are visiting their other parent? While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome break for an overscheduled single parent, for others the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. It can be particularly challenging when your friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. Don’t sink into despair. It’s really important at this time to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This can become an ideal time to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding new people, activities and events that bring joy into your life. Avoid the pity party! Among the greatest challenges for divorced parents is avoiding self-pity.

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5 Ways To Keep Divorce From Scarring You...

5 Ways To Keep Divorce From Scarring Your Kids!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce need not wound and scar your children if you put their emotional and psychological needs first when making crucial decisions. Some parents don’t understand that every decision they make regarding their divorce will affect the wellbeing of their children in countless ways. The emotional scars are not only harder to see, they’re also much harder to erase. Here are five keys to helping your children move through and thrive after divorce. Remind them this is not their fault.  Children tend to blame themselves for divorce, no matter how bad their parents’   relationship has been. The younger the child, the more likely this is so. But even teens feel guilt related to the divorce. Sit down together and talk to your children, emphasizing that they are in no way at fault. You can say something like: “As your parents we’re having problems getting along and agreeing

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6 Key Questions When Children of Divorce...

6 Key Questions When Children of Divorce  Resist Their Other Parent
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parenting after divorce is always challenging, especially when your children act out. One big issue is handling children if they resist spending time with their other parent. Many factors come into play. Here are 6 crucial questions to ask yourself which can help you determine the source of the problem and understand the reasons why your children are resisting contact with their other parent. Are they feeling guilty or disloyal about leaving your presence? This can easily influence how they react to visits or time away living with their other parent. Have they been privy to information, slurs or other comments that make them dislike their other parent? Do they hear you complain about that parent to family or friends? Are they being raised in an environment hostile towards that parent? Has their other parent been mistreating them or disciplining them in a different way than

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9 Tips For Parents When You’re Dating Af

9 Tips For Parents When You’re Dating After Divorce!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC It’s no surprise that jumping into dating after a divorce can be difficult. But dating after a divorce when you have children can be even harder. That’s because your entire perspective on relationships changes after having children. Now you aren't only looking for someone to spend your time with. You are looking for someone to be an adult role model for your children, as well, complicating many of your decisions. Here are 9 important tips to grasp before you start socializing after divorce when you’re a parent. Be open and honest with first dates. Let them know you have children, their general age range and whether they are living with you. This isn’t information you should hide. Being single with children is an important factor that impacts any dating relationship. You also want to find out how your date feels about children and whether they, too,

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