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5 Reasons Why Bad Marriages are Worse...

5 Reasons Why Bad Marriages are Worse for Kids Than Divorce Staying together for the kids. Is this a selfless gesture that puts your children first, or is it more damaging to your child’s psyche than if you were to separate? Here’s a piece of divorce advice: staying together for the children isn’t always noble. Your marriage is the first example of love and partnership that your kids see, and how you treat your partner plays an important role in how your child views relationships in the future. This means if your relationship is healthy, your child will grow up with a great view of partnership. But if your relationship is troubled, it may do harm to their emotional and mental wellbeing. Are you staying in your marriage for the benefit of your children? Here are 5 reasons why bad marriages are worse for kids than divorce. Constant Tension and Unease  Many parents want to stay in their unhappy marriages for

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Divorced Parents: Compassionate Commu...

Divorced Parents: Compassionate Communication With Your kids Is  Crucial For a Happier Outcome! By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During and after divorce your children may be hyper-sensitive about many things. What may have formerly been routine conversations, questions or activities can now be touchy subjects fraught with anxiety, resentment or ager. This is understandable when you consider that the stability of the world they knew has been dramatically altered. Minor insecurities can easily grow into major problems. Children may regress in their behaviors and skills, become more clinging – or more aloof – depending on their adaptability and perspective about the divorce. This is a time to master the art of good parent/child ommunication so you can reinforce or rebuild trust, security and confidence that things will be okay again – despite the changes inflicted by your divorce. Here are some solid tips for more effective communication with your children. Master them today and they will work on your behalf for years and years ahead.   Keep your conversations private – at times when

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Divorcing Parents: Be the Role Model ...

Divorcing Parents: Be the Role Model You Want Your Kids To Be By Rosalind Sedacca I recently came upon this quote from British blogger, David Bly: “Your children will become what you are; so be what you want them to be.” Basically that’s the best advice anyone can give any parent. It’s especially relevant when faced with challenging times, such as your divorce. It’s estimated that 40% of our children will experience the divorce of their parents. The outcome is not the same for all children or all families. That’s why it’s so important for parents facing divorce to understand that every decision you make has consequences that affect your children as well as your own well-being for years and decades to come. As a Divorce & Parenting Coach I’ve found that many parents are short-sighted when it comes to understanding the effects of divorce on their children. They don’t understand that emotional wounds in childhood lead to behaviors in the teen years

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What You Don’t Know About Divor...

What You Don’t Know About Divorcing As a Parent That Can Hurt Your Kids! Divorce catches kids in the middle January is International Child-Centered Divorce Month – a time when divorce filings are highest: after the holidays at the start of the New Year. In recognition of ICCD Month, international Divorce Coach, author and trainer, Rosalind Sedacca, CDC, has gathered family-focused divorce professionals throughout world to give away complimentary ebooks, courses, videos, coaching services and other valuable tools to help parents:   Make the best decisions regarding your children before, during and long after divorce. Avoid serious mistakes that negatively impact your children Learn how divorce affects children at different ages and stages Understand divorce options to choose the best course of action for both parents and children. With more than one million children impacted by divorce each year, why focus on Child-Centered Divorce in January? 5 Things You Don’t Know About Divorcing As a Parent That Can Hurt Your Kids!

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Divorcing or Divorced Parents: Why Ja...

Divorcing or Divorced Parents: Why January is such an important month for you! January is International Child-Centered Divorce Month Join experts in commemorating Child-Centered Divorce Month In the U.S. today nearly 4 out of 10 first marriages end in divorce. Even more significant, 60% of divorcing couples have children, resulting in more than one million kids each year experiencing the divorce of their parents. The consequence of parental divorce takes its toll on everyone in the family. An estimated 25 million children (36%) live apart from their biological father with about 26% of absentee fathers living in a different state than their kids. Close to 17 million children (25%) are living with their single mothers. It may come as no surprise that more divorces are initiated in January than in any other month. A large majority of parents wait until after the holiday season before breaking the divorce news to their children. For this reason the Child-Centered Divorce Network

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Interview with Rosalind Sedacca, CDC ...

Interview with Rosalind Sedacca, CDC — Founder of the  Child-Centered Divorce Network Rosalind Sedacca, CCT, Founder of Child-Centered Divorce Networki What is a Child-Centered Divorce – and how is that different from more typical divorces? Unfortunately, too many parents approach divorce as adversaries. When child custody becomes a battle, everyone loses. Parents are pitted against each other and innocent children inevitably pay the price. When custodial decisions move into contention, creating a scenario where lawyers, legislation and courts determine the direction of your children’s future, you not only lose power in your life, you lose harmony within your already fragile family structure. When you create a Child-Centered Divorce, your children win – on every level because you put their real needs first and foremost. Parents who make a concerted effort to sit down with each other and discuss the future wellbeing of their kids together, keep their perspective where it really belongs – on the children. Most parents

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Holiday Coping Tips For Divorced Pare...

Holiday Coping Tips For Divorced Parents Who Are Apart From Their Children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC One of the saddest consequences of divorce for parents is the alone-time when your children are visiting their other parent. While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome respite for an overscheduled single parent, that’s not always the case. For many parents the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. This is especially so during the holiday season which can become a particularly challenging time – made even more difficult when friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. It’s really important for parents who are alone during the winter holidays to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This time of year can also be an opportunity to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding friends and activities that bring joy into your life on a personal level rather than a

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Parents: Give Children of Divorce Spe...

Parents: Give Children of Divorce Special Holiday Attention By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC For divorcing and divorced parents the holiday season can be especially stressful, pressure-filled and overwhelming. But you’re not alone. For children facing their parents’ divorce or who are experiencing their first holiday season post-divorce, this can be an especially tough time of year. For that reason all parents and extended family members who want to protect children caught in the consequences of a divorce, need to be especially mindful and compassionate during the weeks ahead. It doesn’t take much to give a child or a teen a joyous experience spending time with you. You don’t need expensive gifts or trips to exotic places. Doing things together is what counts most. Sledding, ice skating, baking, creating crafts, watching movies, visiting a children’s museum, taking a short railroad trip, building a snowman, making a family video, adopting a pet from a local shelter, volunteering to wrap gifts for

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Child Custody After Divorce – Are You...

Child Custody After Divorce – Are You Putting Your Children First? By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC The Divorce/Separation Path Custody issues are a huge challenge in every divorce involving children. I am a strong advocate of co-parenting whenever possible. However, because every situation is different when it comes to divorce, I certainly don’t believe legislation should determine custody outcomes for any family. These are issues that caring, conscious parents should be deciding together with only one goal in mind – the very best interest of their children. Unfortunately, too many parents approach this sensitive subject as adversaries. When child custody becomes a battle, everyone loses. Parents are pitted against each other and innocent children inevitably pay the price. When custodial decisions move into contention, creating a scenario where lawyers, legislation and courts determine the direction of your children’s future, you not only lose power in your life, you lose harmony within your already fragile family structure. There is

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Depression In Children of Divorce – H...

Depression In Children of Divorce – Helping Your Kids Cope Effectively By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Remember the emotional toll of divorce on children Divorce has many effects on children. No two children will react in exactly the same way. That’s why parents need to be diligent about watching for signs and indications that your child may be having problems coping with their new reality. Depression is one of the more common reactions we see in children of divorce. Unfortunately, many parents entirely miss or misinterpret the signs of depression. It can take many forms including behavior that is distancing, lethargic and withdrawn. This is often accompanied by a drop in school grades. But depression can also show in other ways, such as agitation, frustration and aggression. When depression takes that form, parents are likely to think of it in terms of discipline problems and respond with punishment. It takes maturity and a broader perspective to stand back

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Parenting Beyond Divorce
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