Child Centered Divorce Blog Index

Dating After Divorce: Straight Answers ...

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC I applaud parents who are striving to create a Child-Centered Divorce. It's not always the easiest path, but it certainly is the most rewarding in the long-term for your children. It involves understanding and respecting your children's needs whenever you are making decisions about your own life. This includes all facets of co-parenting. It also moves into decisions about starting over and dating after divorce. As parents move beyond divorce and start thinking about the prospect of finding new relationships, there is much to take into account. When it comes to issues related to dating after divorce, here are some common questions I am asked and the advice I suggest. Is it ok to date when you're separated, or should you wait until you are legally divorced? It's always better to take some time to prepare yourself before starting to date - legally divorced or not.

Relationship Advice

Co-Parenting After Divorce: 3 Crucial Questions Every Parent Must Answer

Co-Parenting Positively After Divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Sadly, not every Family Law attorney is Child-Centered. Many are seriously too self-centered. They put their personal welfare before the wellbeing of the family caught up in the divorce. The outcome can be a higher conflict and higher cost divorce. Michael Matracci, Esq. is one of the "good guy" collaborative divorce attorneys who avidly supports the concept and principles of Child-Centered Divorce. He is the author of an excellent book I've been recommending for you. Fighting Over the Kids: Resolving Day-to-Day Custody Conflict in Divorce Situations can be found on Amazon and his website at www.divorcewithoutdishonor.com. I had the pleasure of interviewing Michael, who is a divorced parent himself. He shared with me a valuable technique he uses when dealing with parenting issues with his former spouse. I loved the concept and am passing it along to you.

Child-Centered Divorce

Divorce Decisions & the Economy: No Excuse For Irresponsible Parenting

Cooperative coparenting supports children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Is our down-turned economy having an effect on divorce in the U.S. and other nations around the world? While it’s too early for statistical evidence, many Marriage and Divorce professionals word-wide are in agreement. These are tough times. Professionals are seeing couples who were ready to call it quits postponing the divorce decision due to financial reasons. With food, clothing, vehicle, home and rental pricing at record highs, many are not divorcing because they can’t afford it. Does this mean couples are finding new ways to get along and reconsider their marriages? In some cases, yes. However, for others it just means adapting to ongoing states of unhappiness, disappointment and frustration. This, of course, does not bear well for their innocent children. They experience the negative consequences of a distressed marriage. The kids are affected whether the couple

Child-Centered Divorce

What If Your Kids Resist Divorce Visits With Their Other Parent?

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parenting after divorce is always challenging, especially when your children act out. One big issue is handling children if they resist visitation with their other parent. Many factors come into play when this occurs. Here are some questions to ask yourself which can help you determine the source of the problem. They’ll also help you understand the reasons why your children are resisting post-divorce contact with their other parent. For simplification purposes, I’m using Dad as the example. However, this happens to fathers and mothers alike depending on their prior and post-divorce relationships. Questions for parental self-reflection Are the kids feeling guilty or disloyal when leaving your presence? This can easily influence their feelings toward spending time with their Dad. Have they been privy to information, slurs or other comments that make them dislike their Dad? Do they hear you complain about him to family or

Parenting After Divorce

Breaking The Divorce News? 5 Pitfalls To Avoid When Telling Kids!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Facing divorce and stymied about how to tell your kids? Wondering how it will affect them? Worried about hurting them with the news? When’s the best time to talk? What to say and not say? How they will respond? Not sure just what to confide? Well, you’re not alone. There’s no doubt this might be one of the most difficult conversations you’ll ever have. It’s a talk your children won’t want to have – and you must be prepared. 5 Big Mistakes To Avoid Here are the five mistakes most commonly made by parents. Be sure you don’t add stress to your children’s lives by making these errors. 1. Exposing your children to parental conflict. That not only includes fighting. Bad-mouthing their other parent, eye-rolling, sarcasm and other disrespectful behavior or remarks count too. Studies show that this does more damage to children than any other

How Do I Tell the Kids About The Divorce?

4 Ways Parental Anger and Conflict Harm Children of Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Does parental anger affect children of divorce? Studies repeatedly show that fighting around the children does more damage to them than divorce itself. That’s why as parents we need to be diligent in monitoring our children as well as our own behavior. So, we can safeguard our kids from emotional and psychological damage. Exposure to conflict can change a child’s self-image and sense of security. It impacts their concept of the world and their ability to trust others. The consequences can last a lifetime. A study published in the Journal of Research on Adolescence* shows that children exposed to constant parental bickering are more likely to be depressed. They are also more prone to expressing other “problem behaviors,” including substance abuse, aggression and poor school grades. Some children regress back to bed-wetting, thumb sucking or limiting social contact. Others move into bullying, acting out and thoughts

Child-Centered Divorce

Parents: 5 Crucial Tips For Talking To Kids During & After Divorce

Communication with your child is essential. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During and after divorce your children may be hypersensitive about many things. What may have formerly been routine conversations are no longer that. Questions or activities can now be touchy subjects fraught with anxiety, resentment or ager. This is understandable when you consider that the stability of the world they knew has been dramatically altered. Minor insecurities can easily grow into major problems. Children may regress in their behaviors and skills. They may become more clinging, aggressive or more aloof – depending on their adaptability and perspective about the divorce. This is a time to master the art of good parent/child communication. Time to reinforce or rebuild trust, security and confidence that things will be okay again despite the changes inflicted by your divorce. Here are some solid tips for more effective communication with your children.

Child-Centered Divorce

Divorced? 5 Valuable Life Lessons to Master Now

parenting after divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce affects everyone differently and its impact lingers with us for different periods of time. But there’s one thing that never changes: the aftermath of divorce can be a sense of self-discovery or internment in a self-made prison of depression and resentment. What influences us the most is how well we accept what is and our determination to use the divorce as a pathway to a new and better life. The good news: it’s all up to us. We can create an attitude of positive expectation or we can subjugate ourselves to months and years of self-pity and despair down the road. The bad news: it’s not always easy to change our attitude or perspective on life. But if you do, you’ll be rewarded with a happier future for yourself as well as your children. Here are some vital

Parenting After Divorce

21 Questions For Divorcing Parents Before Fighting Over the Kids

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Larry Sarezky is a Family Law attorney with a strong, child-centered focus, which is why I so value and respect his work. He tells me his biggest fear, as a divorce lawyer, is that thousands of children are growing up wondering why the “grown-ups” didn’t protect them from their parents’ high conflict divorces. As Founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network for parents, I totally concur. When parents don’t take responsibility for their divorce actions and decisions, the outcomes can be pretty nasty, especially for their children. Sure, they try to justify and rationalize their behavior – but we know better. Parents have CHOICES every step of the way. The consequences of those choices can be damaging or supportive to your children. It depends where you put your attention. Crucial Questions To Answer Before you Battle ... Larry created a list of ten questions to ask clients

Child-Centered Divorce

Co-Parenting With An Addict After Divorce: Advice For Both Parents!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Getting divorced and then co-parenting is especially challenging for parents who are coping with addiction issues. Or find themselves co-parenting with an addict. This is even more complicated if one or both parents are not fully dependable, trustworthy or responsible. 6 Challenges That Complicate the Co-Parenting Experience Difficulties can be compounded by the many issues all parents face following a divorce. This includes one or both parents … 1) Giving the raw emotions resulting from the divorce an active voice in this new stage in their lives. 2) Bringing previous baggage from the marriage into play. Ongoing conflicts, differing styles of communication, unresolved issues and continual frustrations can hinder negotiating a co-parenting plan. 3) Vying for the respect and love of the children. It can be tempting to make parenting decisions in ways that win them popularity with the kids. 4) Letting anger and resentment

Parenting After Divorce

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Dating After Divorce: Straight Answers ...

Co-Parenting After Divorce: 3 Crucial Qu...

Divorce Decisions & the Economy: No Excu

What If Your Kids Resist Divorce Visits ...

Breaking The Divorce News? 5 Pitfalls To...

4 Ways Parental Anger and Conflict Harm ...

Parents: 5 Crucial Tips For Talking To K...

Divorced? 5 Valuable Life Lessons to Mas...

21 Questions For Divorcing Parents Befor...

Co-Parenting With An Addict After Divorc...

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