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Child Centered Divorce
The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent
Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC
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Divorce Co-Parenting Depends On Coordina...

Divorce Co-Parenting Depends On Coordination & Cooperation
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Children are always affected by Divorce Moving through a divorce can seem like an insurmountable obstacle. For many parents it is just the beginning of a new and equally intimidating challenge: co-parenting your children. Hats off to all of you who have chosen to remain in your children’s lives as co-parents. It means both of you deeply care about your children. It confirms you want to continue raising them in the least-disruptive possible manner. Of course, not all parents can share the parenting process in this way. For some couples it is not the ideal situation to even attempt it. Those couples who are determined to co-parent mindfully, certainly deserve credit and acknowledgement. They seek solutions that involve cooperation and coordination between both parents. For example, choosing to live relatively close to one another. That reduces negative impact on school, sports and

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Keys To Rebuilding Your Self Esteem Afte...

Keys To Rebuilding Your Self Esteem After Divorce
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Communication with your child is essential. Divorce can be devastating on many levels. In addition to the financial and stress toll on both partners, it can easily wreak havoc on one’s self-esteem. Even those who initiate the divorce process can experience tremendous emotional turmoil resulting in guilt, anxiety and insecurity. Those who were not expecting or desiring the break-up can feel psychologically battered. They are often confused and come away questioning their own worth. It’s hard to tackle these burdens alone. A divorce coach, therapist, support group or other related resources can be quite valuable. They will remind you that: you are not alone in your experiences or feelings there can be a brighter future ahead for you you must take proactive steps in that direction While family and friends are usually very well-intentioned, their support may not always be helpful for

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6 “Other Woman/Man” Mistakes Divorcing P

6 “Other Woman/Man” Mistakes Divorcing Parents Must Never Make!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When there’s an “other woman” (OW) in the picture, divorce can be vastly more complicated for parents. (Of course, it’s the same with the “other man.”) However, the challenges that can come with the "other woman” don't change the parenting rules. Affairs and new relationship partners mean you’re coping with tremendous emotional turmoil. And you deserve to be heard, validated and treated with great compassion at this time. But your kids deserve great compassion as well! When you’re a parent it is essential that you don’t make the big “never do” mistakes. It’s especially important when talking to your children and dealing with the OW – as tempting as it may be to do otherwise. That's the foundation of a successful child-centered divorce. Here are 6 damaging behaviors and “never do” mistakes you must avoid to show you love your kids more than you hate the

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5 Pitfalls to Avoid When Telling Kids Ab...

5 Pitfalls to Avoid When Telling Kids About Divorce
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Facing divorce and stymied about how to tell your kids? Wondering how it will affect them? Worried about hurting them with the news? When’s the best time to talk? What to say and not say? What they will say? Not sure just what to confide?  Well, you’re not alone. There’s no doubt this might be one of the most difficult conversations you’ll ever have. It’s a talk your children won’t want to have – and you must be prepared. Here are the five mistakes most commonly made by parents regarding the divorce talk. Be sure you don’t add stress to your children’s lives by making these errors. You'll find answers to the other questions on my blog at ChildCenteredDivorce.com.  1. Exposing your children to parental conflict or fighting. Studies show that this does more damage to children than any other factor in their lives – whether

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Parents: Are You Damaging Your Kids When...

Parents: Are You Damaging Your Kids When You Fight?
Parents fight & kids suffer during divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  For years, as Founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network, I’ve been telling parents one crucial point. Fighting around the children is more damaging to them than divorce. Part of having an amicable divorce is giving your children’s psychological needs top priority when making all decisions. In that way you can avoid doing serious emotional harm to the kids. Many studies over the years supports this point, including several in the Journal of Research on Adolescence. Whether the focus of these studies is on fighting over financial issues, time-sharing, child-care or other related topics, the consequences are basically the same. Exposure to parental conflict psychologically damages your kids! The overall consensus is clear. Children exposed to constant parental bickering are more likely to be depressed. They are also more prone to expressing other “problem behaviors,” including

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Does Divorce Scar Children? Or Selfish P...

Does Divorce Scar Children? Or Selfish Parents?
Divorce catches kids in the middle By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce is a highly emotional topic. When children are involved, the consequences are far more dramatic. And not surprisingly, so are our opinions. I know many people sincerely believe that no divorce is a good divorce. They argue that children are always harmed by the physical and emotional separation of their parents. Therefore, parents should – for the sake of the kids – just stick it out. They should not consider divorce until the children are grown. This is a particularly prevalent view for many adult children of divorce. Too often they have experienced the dramatic life changes that come with divorce. Many feel permanently scarred as a result. That response is certainly understandable. But it’s not the final word on this subject. I have another perspective. It’s based on the experience of being raised in

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Demonizing Divorce? What’s Best For YOUR

Demonizing Divorce? What’s Best For YOUR Kids?
The Divorce/Separation Path By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce is rarely an outcome married couples expect or anticipate. But marital strife can take its toll. For many, divorce is the chosen path for coping with relationship challenges. This makes divorce a rather controversial topic. Google the subject and you’ll find conflicting perspectives on every facet of divorce, especially when it comes to parenting issues. Of course that comes as no surprise to every mother and father who battled with the guilt, anxiety, fears and insecurities that rear up when contemplating divorce and its aftermath. As you know, the Child-Centered Divorce Network welcomes this kind of dialogue. I participate in many Summits and discussion groups. I comment on many blogs and write columns for several divorce and relationship websites. I offer my own advice and opinions on topics related to divorce and its effect on children. SHOULD WE

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6 Reasons Pets Help Families Better Cope...

6 Reasons Pets Help Families Better Cope With Divorce!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Pets can be a helpful resource for you and your children when handling the challenges of divorce. If your family has one or more pets, let your children have access to them as much as they desire. Pets can provide great emotional benefits to kids during times of insecurity. Your children are fortunate that the pets they love can still be in their lives. Don’t hurt your children or your pet by discarding or giving the pet away during the divorce process and its aftermath. If you don’t already have a pet, I recommend getting one. However, that’s only if you are in a position to be responsible to that innocent animal during this time of additional stress in your life. If a family pet is out of the question, please consider giving your children time to play with the pets of friends and family. Take

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3 Steps To Rebuilding Your Self Esteem A...

3 Steps To Rebuilding Your Self Esteem After Divorce
Anger-Conflict Programs for Co-Parenting & Other Life Challenges By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce can be devastating on many levels. In addition to the financial and stress toll on both partners, it can easily wreak havoc on one’s self-esteem. Even those who initiate the divorce can experience tremendous emotional turmoil, consuming them with guilt, anxiety and insecurity. For those who were not expecting or didn’t want the break-up, the consequence can be even more difficult. Divorce can leave them feeling psychologically battered, confused and questioning their own worth. It’s hard to tackle these burdens alone. A support group, personal coach, professional counselor or other resource can be extremely helpful. It will remind you that you are not alone in your experiences or feelings. You’ll also find a path to a brighter future ahead for you – if you take proactive steps in that direction. While family and

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5 Mindset Keys To More Positive Co-Paren...

5 Mindset Keys To More Positive Co-Parenting  (& a happier you) After Divorce!
Cooperative coparenting supports children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  Parenting during and after divorce can be complex, frustrating and confusing. However, every day parents around the world cope with the challenges and raise happy, well-adjusted children. There are many factors that impact your effectiveness as a co-parent. Here are five that greatly influence your pre- and post-divorce co-parenting success.  Monitor Your Attitude  Attitude plays a crucial part in every facet of our lives. It’s especially important when we’re parenting after divorce. If you make a commitment to creating as positive an experience as possible, on behalf of the children you love, you are on your way to succeeding. What attitude are you conveying about your divorce? Try to catch your thoughts and the way you speak about it. Are you filled with negativity? Resentment? Fear? Are your days consumed with a “poor me” mindset? Are you attracting

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