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Child Centered Divorce

The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent

Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

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Parental Divorces During School: Easing ...

Parental Divorces During School: Easing The Way For Children
Divorce catches kids in the middle By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  While many families time their separation or divorce for the summer months to   take advantage of the school break, many other families initiate the divorce decision in the midst of the school year. January is one of the most common months to start the process. There are several reasons why this sometimes becomes a necessity. Many couples considering splitting decide to wait until after the holidays to break the news to their children. Others wait to take advantage of year-end job bonuses so they’ll have the extra funds to cover attorney, moving and other related expenses. Still others are faced with unexpected circumstances that accelerate the decision to divorce. Regardless, it’s not the why that should be concerning us at this time – it’s the how. How are we as parents going to approach this separation or

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How To Handle An Uncooperative Ex During...

How To Handle An Uncooperative Ex During Divorce Co-Parenting
Children affected by Divorce Co-parenting after divorce is never easy. This is especially true when you have a contentious relationship or if your ex-partner is not cooperative. You will be subject to a tremendous amount of stress about your ex-spouse’s parenting skills, as well as the financial needs of your child. Dealing with divorce is hard as it is; throwing the challenges of co-parenting into the mix will make it extra hard. What Is Co-Parenting? Co-parenting is a unique arrangement between two ex-spouses who have a child together. When you go through a divorce, one is left to gain custody of the child. Regardless of who has custody of the child, both parties are responsible for caring for and providing for the needs of the child or children. In a normal situation, both parents are expected to play an active role in the development and growth

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Managing Anger & Other Co-Parenting Chal

Managing Anger & Other Co-Parenting Challenges After Divorce
Anger-Conflict Programs for Co-Parenting & Other Life Challenges By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Anger is a natural consequence of a relationship breakup or divorce. But not all anger is the same and it’s important to understand how anger is affecting not only your divorce, but also your life and your other relationships. Is anger seeping into your relationship with your kids? With your in-laws, or other family members? Will anger negatively impact your future romantic relationships? If not handled affectively, it certainly will. No one wants to be in a relationship with an angry partner. But often we don’t see the anger others see in us. Or we feel our anger is so justified we don’t care about how it affects us. Or affects others. Especially our kids! Balancing Our Anger Effectively There are ways to handle, manage and work through our anger so it’s not destructive

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Children and Divorce: 5 Keys To Help You...

Children and Divorce: 5 Keys To Help Your Kids Thrive
Make smart parenting decisions after divorce. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC No one plans to get divorced. But more than one million children in the U.S. will experience its affects this year alone. Divorce has become relatively mainstream in our culture, but that doesn’t make it easier for the parents or children involved. Consequently, innocent kids are coping with the consequences every day. The good news is that divorce need not wound and scar your children if you put their emotional and psychological needs first when making crucial decisions. It’s misguided parents – angry, resentful, hurt and mistrusting – who unintentionally set their children up for painful outcomes. These parents don’t understand that every decision they make regarding their divorce will affect the wellbeing of their children in countless ways. The emotional scars are not only harder to see, they’re also much harder to erase. Here are

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Interview with Rosalind Sedacca, CDC — F

Interview with Rosalind Sedacca, CDC — Founder of the  Child-Centered Divorce Network
Rosalind Sedacca, CCT, Founder of Child-Centered Divorce Networki What is a Child-Centered Divorce – and how is that different from more typical divorces? Unfortunately, too many parents approach divorce as adversaries. When child custody becomes a battle, everyone loses. Parents are pitted against each other and innocent children inevitably pay the price. When custodial decisions move into contention, creating a scenario where lawyers, legislation and courts determine the direction of your children’s future, you not only lose power in your life, you lose harmony within your already fragile family structure. When you create a Child-Centered Divorce, your children win – on every level because you put their real needs first and foremost. Parents who make a concerted effort to sit down with each other and discuss the future wellbeing of their kids together, keep their perspective where it really belongs – on the children. Most parents

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Divorced Parents: When You Make Co-Paren...

Divorced Parents: When You Make Co-Parenting Mistakes, Step Up & Make It Right!
Anger-Conflict Programs for Co-Parenting & Other Life Challenges By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce drives some people crazy. Because of that, they make many poor decisions. Their judgment, integrity and credibility are easy to question. Their decisions regarding taking responsibility for their children come under scrutiny. There is much we can all learn from these mistakes. And wisdom we can take away that is important for all of us to remember: It’s never too late to get it right – when your children are at stake! In the heat of the divorce drama, we may have settled for a decision or two that we later regretted and still feel resentful. Or we made a child-related agreement that, in hindsight, was not in our child’s best interest – but we don’t know quite how to remedy the situation. Perhaps we lost our tempers at an inappropriate time and

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Children Going Through Divorce: How Pare...

Children Going Through Divorce: How Parents Can Meet Their Emotional Needs
the emotional toll of divorce on children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC A child's psychological needs are greatly increased during and after a divorce. Often they are experiencing an economic and emotional roller coaster, which can lead to guilt, fear and confusion. If parents are consciously focused on and sensitive to their child's needs through divorce and its aftermath, they will do a better job of meeting those needs in the weeks, months and years ahead. At this time it’s important that both parents strive to minimize the price your child has to pay for the breakup of your relationship. To do this effectively it’s important to understand some of your child’s most significant emotional and psychological needs: Approval and Acceptance: This will be a child's greatest need because their sense of self is very likely in a fragile state, especially if they have been exposed to

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How Divorce Affects Children & Teens: Pa

How Divorce Affects Children & Teens: Parents Need Realistic Expectations!
Children are affected by divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parenting is always complex. Parenting following a divorce can add many other layers of distraction and confusion to the mix. That makes it even more important for parents to be aware of how their children are responding to the divorce. Misunderstanding Your Child’s Intentions One common error parents make is misunderstanding the stage of development their children are at which can lead to unrealistic expectations. Too often parents will assume that their child has a realistic handle on their emotions. They also believe the child has a deeper understanding of human nature than is really possible at their age. So when their child acts out, expresses anger or otherwise misbehaves, many parents misconstrue their intentions. Parents don’t fully grasp the fear and insecurity that divorce brings up in children. They mistakenly see these young beings as little

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Divorce Advice From Family & Friends – D

Divorce Advice From Family & Friends – Don’t Take It!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC The Divorce/Separation Path Divorce by its very nature brings up lots of judgments. Most people have strong opinions about divorce, strongly influenced by their own experiences or the programming of their upbringing. You’re very unlikely to change anyone’s mind about the best way to handle divorce when you’re a parent. So don’t try. Your family and friends mean well. They want to support and help you through any crisis. But be aware that along with their support they bring their personal prejudices. These are weighed down by the baggage of judgments that inevitably color their advice. If you allow yourself to be influenced by the well-meant suggestions of these individuals, you may find yourself falling into a deep quagmire of confusion or even depression. No one walks in your shoes or has experienced your history. At the same time, most

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How to Talk to Your Kids When They are U...

How to Talk to Your Kids When They are Upset About Your Divorce
A Guest Post by Ben Stich The last thing divorced or separated parents want is for their kids to be hurt by their break-up any more than necessary. There is nothing worse for a parent than to see their child in pain. Yet, it is almost inevitable that the kids will experience some level of pain, disappointment and confusion. Human nature being what it is, it is normal for divorced parents to have difficulty tolerating their children’s distress. As a result, some conversations between an anxious soon-to-be divorced mother and her upset son go something like this: Parent: What’s wrong, honey? Son: Why do you have to get divorced? I hate it! Parent: It’s going to be, OK. Son: (Sniffling). But, but… Parent: Don’t worry, everything will be OK. Son: OK, Mommy. At first blush, it seems like this mother did a nice job of reassuring her child, right? No!

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