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Child Centered Divorce

The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent

Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

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4 Ways To Ease Divorce Transitions For Y...

4 Ways To Ease Divorce Transitions For Your Kids
Children affected by Divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During divorce proceedings parenting plans and contact schedules are usually established to create a semblance of routine in this new chapter of family life. I am a strong believer in co-parenting whenever possible to serve the best interest of your children. Sometimes parallel parenting is the norm, meaning you both parent the children but with minimum communication between parents. Keep in mind that your kids pick up on the emotional energy around their parents and life after divorce is smoother and easier for them when their parents behave with civility and maturity. However you work out your shared parenting  plan, it’s the reality of post-divorce daily life that puts co-parents to the test. Here are 4 ways to ease the process for everyone involved. Be patient with one another. Starting any new schedule in life is never easy. Chances

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Shared Parenting & Child Custody – Put D

Shared Parenting & Child Custody – Put Down the Boxing Gloves
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When divorced parents let the negative emotions they're feeling toward their former spouses - hatred, hurt, disappointment, guilt, shame, anxiety, frustration, mistrust and more - influence their decisions about child-custody issues, they are sabotaging their children. It is selfish, insensitive and extremely unproductive to let your personal vendetta determine the relationship your children have with their other parent – and extended family on both sides. Throughout the U.S. and the world divorce professionals are talking about proposed changes to child custody legislation. Investigative committees are being formed and new legislation is being considered about whether shared parenting may be the best custodial situation for all children of divorcing parents. While I am a strong advocate of shared parenting - it worked very successfully for me - I do not believe it's the right or only answer for everyone. Because every situation is different when it comes

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4 Ways to Help Kids of Divorce Transitio...

4 Ways to Help Kids of Divorce Transition Between Homes
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During divorce proceedings parenting plans and contact schedules are usually established to create a semblance of routine in this new chapter of family life. I am a strong believer in co-parenting whenever possible to serve the best interest of your children. Sometimes parallel parenting is the norm, meaning you both parent the children but with minimum communication between parents. Keep in mind that your kids pick up on the emotional energy around their parents and life after divorce is smoother and easier for them when their parents behave with civility and maturity. However you work out your shared parenting plan, it’s the reality of post-divorce daily life that puts co-parents to the test. Here are 4 ways to ease the process for everyone involved. 1. Be patient with one another. Starting any new schedule in life is never easy. Chances are the between-home transitions will present

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5 Tips For Reducing The Negative Impact ...

5 Tips For Reducing The Negative Impact of Divorce On Your Children!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Communication with our children is always important, but never as essential as when they are impacted by separation or divorce. Children are vulnerable and easily frightened by changes in their routines. The more you talk to and comfort them, the less stress and anxiety they’ll experience. Children of divorce need additional attention and support. This is the time to reassure your children that you are taking care of matters and everyone in the family will be okay. Then, of course, take responsibility for doing what needs to be done to assure their well-being. Here are five important ways you can minimize the impact of divorce on your children to help them thrive during and after your divorce. Strive to keep as much normalcy in your children’s lives as is feasible. Maintaining relationships with friends and neighbors provides a sense of stability and continuity. Keeping children in

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KIDS EMAIL: a smart tool for divorced pa...

KIDS EMAIL: a smart tool for divorced parents … PROTECTS KIDS WHILE GIVING THEM THEIR FREEDOM
By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Children of divorce face challenges other kids don’t have. In most cases, they don’t see Mom and Dad at the same time in the same home. They travel between homes and can spend days, weeks – even months – between visits with their other parent. Fortunately today’s technology makes life easier for these kids than ever before. Email, texting, notebooks and smart phones can build bridges with parents at a distance. But with the convenience also comes anxiety as parental stress mounts regarding how to ensure safe communication when using email and social media. Are your children being protected from spam, vulgarity, viruses and predators while on the internet, smart phones and tablets? Have you lost parental control over who they contact and what they say? Do you feel your children are safe when communicating with you, their other parent, family and friends? KidsEmail is great

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Bashing Your Ex Is Bad News For Your Chi...

Bashing Your Ex Is Bad News For Your Children!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT We all do it from time to time. Make a sarcastic comment about our ex, criticize something they did or didn’t do, gesture or grimace our faces when referring to our former spouse. When we do it in front of, near or within hearing distance of our children, we set ourselves up for a hornet’s nest of problems. We have all heard this, but it’s easy to forget or let slide. It hurts our children when they hear one of their parents put down the other. This is so even if your child does not say anything about it. With rare exceptions, children innately feel they are part of both parents. They love them both even when that love isn’t returned to them in the same way. When you put down their other parent your children are likely to interpret it as a put-down of part

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Child Custody During Divorce – Are You P

Child Custody During Divorce – Are You Putting Your Children First?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT  When facing divorce as a parent child-custody issues can become quite challenging and emotions regarding divorce-related issues can easily become charged. I recently came upon an article about proposed changes to child custody legislation pending in some states. An investigative committee was being formed to consider whether “shared parenting may be the best custodial situation for all children of divorcing parents.” While I am a strong advocate of shared parenting – it worked very successfully for me – I do not believe it’s the right or only answer for everyone. Because every situation is different when it comes to divorce, I certainly don’t believe legislation should be determining custody outcomes for any family. These are issues that caring, conscious parents should be deciding together with only one goal in mind – the very best interest of their children. Unfortunately, too many parents approach this issue as

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Divorce Rules For Parents From Your Chil...

Divorce Rules For Parents From Your Children
Parenting Coordinator and trainer Ann Marie Termini, co-founder of the Cooperative Parenting Institute, has put together a set of rules that every divorced parent should take to heart. That’s because it comes from the heart of children like yours. While kids can’t adequately express themselves, these are the messages they want to share with you.  Read them over on a daily basis until they are deeply entrenched in your mind and psyche. Before making important decisions that affect the well-being of your children during and after divorce, even many years after, refer to this list. Make sure you are not compromising their boundaries or putting them in awkward situations to appease your own needs, agenda and judgments about your former spouse – who is their other parent.  With this list of rules in mind you will parent more effectively, earn your children’s life-long respect and give your kids the best

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How Does Virtual Visitation Affect Child...

How Does Virtual Visitation Affect Children of Divorce?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Divorce, like most other aspects of our culture, is being affected by new technological advances. In recent years several states in the U.S. have started allowing and even encouraging virtual visitation as part of the divorce agreement. The purpose is to enable a divorced parent with whom the children are not living to enjoy connection time with their child by utilizing a variety of electronic communication tools. This can include video web chats, email dialogue, Face-time, sharing iPod music, playing iPhone games together or other technological interactions. While many are embracing this reality as a means of maintaining a stronger connection between a parent and their child who is living apart, there are others expressing concern. Some feel these technology-based alternatives are not a substitute for in-person visits. These divorce professionals are afraid that some parents will rely too heavily on virtual communication. They may forgo

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Family Vacations After Divorce can be re...

Family Vacations After Divorce can be rewarding despite the challenges!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Even though divorce is a common reality in today’s world, it can still be emotionally devastating and difficult to accept. During vacation time adults and children can easily be upset by past memories or former traditions that are no longer part of their lives. This can lead to feelings of not being a “real” family anymore. Accusations, guilt, blame and a sense of inadequacy easily fuels conflict that can undermine even the most festive occasions or well-meant plans. Too often post-divorce families set themselves up for disappointment by making comparisons with vacations of the past. Children can erroneously expect certain family traditions to continue. Concerned parents may try to replicate the close bonds and sense of security within the family – and regret that things are just not the same. Instead, think proactively! Start creating new experiences, new memories and new places to explore. By talking

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