divorce Archives - Child-Centered Divorce

2 Crucial Gifts Your Child Needs From Yo...

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC One of the greatest challenges divorced parents face is adequately meeting their children’s needs during and after the divorce. While most parents pay lip service to focusing on the wellbeing of the children, sadly that’s not always the case. Divorcing and divorced parents can become overwhelmed by the emotional upheaval they are experiencing, especially if they don’t chose a positive divorce platform. After marinating in the anger, hurt, resentment, guilt, shame, blame and other conflicting emotions for so long, some lose their capacity to empathize with what their children are going through. Or they just stop caring. Other parents need parenting themselves. They don’t have the ability to put their own needs aside to address the turmoil they see in their children. More than ever before co-parents need to feel and show compassion for their children. So often kids are feeling frightened, confused, guilty, angry, ashamed

Parenting After Divorce

Children in the Equation: How Kids are Affected by Divorce

Divorce catches kids in the middle It is estimated that between 42 to 45% percent of first marriages end in divorce. As partners who were once in love, going through a divorce can be extremely painful and frustrating. This experience is intensified ten-fold when you have children. There is no doubt that divorce has difficult emotional, educational, and social impacts on children. That’s why we’re teaching you the importance of co-parenting children through divorce and using a marriage therapist to your advantage after separation. How Kids are Affected by Divorce There are many reasons to see a marriage therapist if you are thinking about or are currently going through a divorce. One of the main reasons is so that you and your spouse can learn how to manage your children throughout your divorce. Here are just some of the ways that children are affected emotionally and mentally

Guest Experts

Divorcing Parents – Think Twice Before Going to Court

Parents Fighting Around Kids After Divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When famous celebrities like Mel Gibson, Denise Richards, Halle Berry and others battle through a divorce, the stakes are high. Millions of dollars are often in contention, blurring issues related to child-custody and visitation. These couples hire "killer" attorneys and commit to paying an enormous price -- which includes not only hefty legal fees, but a tremendous time expenditure and emotional toll. Too many non-celebrity couples facing divorce blindly choose this same path - often without considering the reality of all the costs involved. They do not have the revenue to maintain ongoing litigation in the courts. Nor do they have a game plan for putting together the pieces of their shattered family after the legal battles are finally over. Sadly they come to realize that celebrities are usually poor role models. They don't necessarily make

Child-Centered Divorce

How To Handle An Uncooperative Ex During Divorce Co-Parenting

Children affected by Divorce Co-parenting after divorce is never easy. This is especially true when you have a contentious relationship or if your ex-partner is not cooperative. You will be subject to a tremendous amount of stress about your ex-spouse’s parenting skills, as well as the financial needs of your child. Dealing with divorce is hard as it is; throwing the challenges of co-parenting into the mix will make it extra hard. What Is Co-Parenting? Co-parenting is a unique arrangement between two ex-spouses who have a child together. When you go through a divorce, one is left to gain custody of the child. Regardless of who has custody of the child, both parties are responsible for caring for and providing for the needs of the child or children. In a normal situation, both parents are expected to play an active role in the development and growth

Child-Centered Divorce

Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays Can Be Especially Tough!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Are you facing alone time without the kids this holiday season? Often that’s one of the saddest consequences of divorce when you’re a parent. What do you do when your children are visiting their other parent? While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome break for an overscheduled single parent, for others the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. It can be particularly challenging when your friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. Don’t sink into despair. It’s really important at this time to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This can become an ideal time to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding new people, activities and events that bring joy into your life. Among the greatest challenges for divorced parents is avoiding self-pity. When you’re overwhelmed by

Child-Centered Divorce

Rebuilding Your Self Esteem After Divorce Is Essential!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce can be devastating on many levels. In addition to the financial and stress toll on both partners, it can easily wreak havoc on one’s self-esteem. Even those who initiate the divorce process can experience tremendous emotional turmoil resulting in guilt, anxiety and insecurity. Those who were not expecting or in any way desiring the break-up can come away feeling psychologically battered, confused and questioning their own worth. It’s hard to tackle these burdens alone. A support group, personal coach, professional counselor or other expert resources will be very valuable in reminding you that 1) you are not alone in your experiences or feelings and 2) there is a brighter future ahead for you – if you take proactive steps in that direction. While family and friends are usually very well intentioned, their support may not always be valuable for you. They have their own agendas,

Relationship Advice

5 Steps To A Brighter Future After Divorce!

parenting after divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Accepting the reality and finality of divorce can be a tough challenge. We need to be able to let go of the life we knew and prepare to face an unknown future. That can be intimidating. Here are 5 key steps to accepting your new reality with grace, peace and positive expectations for a happier life ahead, especially if you’re also a parent! 1) Focus on yourself -- not on your former spouse We can’t ever undo the past. But the past can undo us -- if we’re not careful about our thoughts, beliefs and actions. The only one we can ever change is ourselves. Don’t waste valuable time pining about the past, blaming your ex or wishing you had done something differently. Focus instead on how you can transform yourself today into the person you most want to

Relationship Advice

Teens Taking Sides A Painful Consequence of Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC I received the following question which poses many challenges related to divorce and parenting. While there is never a one-size-fits-all answer to relationship questions, I’m sharing my response with you as a perspective worth considering. This may be useful to initiate conversations with your former spouse and children or for discussion with a therapist or divorce coach if you are seeing one. "I am divorced for a short while, after being separated for several years. My 16-year-old daughter is awful to me and she yells "I hate you" and even curses at me even in public. I am sure she blames me for leaving her mom, but my other two children (boys, one older and one younger) seem to be dealing with the divorce fine. My problem is that I have no control over discipline. I would never speak to anyone the way she speaks to

Parenting After Divorce

Success Strategies for Effective Post-Divorce Parent-Child Communication

Parent-child communication after divorce really matters. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC It’s no secret that one of the biggest challenges a divorced parent faces is maintaining good communication with your children. Obviously all parents struggle with communication issues as their children grow, but children who have had their lives dramatically altered by separation or divorce need even more attention – and diligent observation by their parents. Children tend not to tell you when they are angry, resentful, confused, hurt or depressed. Instead they reflect their problems through their behavior – acting out or perhaps turning inward in ways that you may not have experienced prior to the divorce. Here are some tips that most professionals agree are good ways to encourage positive and productive post-divorce communication between you and your children. Many of these are obvious or natural behaviors. Some can easily be forgotten or overlooked amid

Parenting After Divorce

4 Ways To Ease Divorce Transitions For Your Kids

Children affected by Divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During divorce proceedings parenting plans and contact schedules are usually established to create a semblance of routine in this new chapter of family life. I am a strong believer in co-parenting whenever possible to serve the best interest of your children. Sometimes parallel parenting is the norm, meaning you both parent the children but with minimum communication between parents. Keep in mind that your kids pick up on the emotional energy around their parents and life after divorce is smoother and easier for them when their parents behave with civility and maturity. However you work out your shared parenting plan, it’s the reality of post-divorce daily life that puts co-parents to the test. Here are 4 ways to ease the process for everyone involved. Be patient with one another. Starting any new schedule in life is never easy. Chances

Parenting After Divorce

2 Crucial Gifts Your Child Needs From Yo...

Children in the Equation: How Kids are A...

Divorcing Parents – Think Twice Before G

How To Handle An Uncooperative Ex During...

Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays...

Rebuilding Your Self Esteem After Divorc...

5 Steps To A Brighter Future After Divor...

Teens Taking Sides A Painful Consequence...

Success Strategies for Effective Post-Di...

4 Ways To Ease Divorce Transitions For Y...

Blog Posts by Date (Archives)

Categories