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Child Centered Divorce

The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent

Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

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10 Key Questions Divorced Co-Parents Mus...

10 Key Questions Divorced Co-Parents Must Answer If You Really Love Your Kids!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorced parents face challenges that are not only complex; they are long lasting as well. There are many variations of joint parenting, co-parenting and other forms of divorced parenting based on how well both parents get along, their geographical proximity, the age of the children and other contributing factors. Every decision made will affect the children involved -- and the impact can be detected in children’s behavior, attitudes and levels of self-esteem. To help parents co-parent more effectively I’ve created a list of significant questions to ask yourselves. I share these during mentoring sessions with parents not only before, but long after the divorce as well. If you sit together and discuss these questions, or review them during mediation, it can help you avoid serious mistakes and unnecessary strife now and well into the future. The more honest you are with yourself and your former spouse,

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Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays...

Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays Can Be Especially Tough!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Are you facing alone time without the kids this holiday season? Often that’s one of the saddest consequences of divorce when you’re a parent. What do you do when your children are visiting their other parent? While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome break for an overscheduled single parent, for others the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. It can be particularly challenging when your friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. Don’t sink into despair. It’s really important at this time to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This can become an ideal time to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding new people, activities and events that bring joy into your life. Among the greatest challenges for divorced parents is avoiding self-pity. When you’re overwhelmed by

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Rebuilding Your Self Esteem After Divorc...

Rebuilding Your Self Esteem After Divorce Is Essential!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce can be devastating on many levels. In addition to the financial and stress toll on both partners, it can easily wreak havoc on one’s self-esteem. Even those who initiate the divorce process can experience tremendous emotional turmoil resulting in guilt, anxiety and insecurity. Those who were not expecting or in any way desiring the break-up can come away feeling psychologically battered, confused and questioning their own worth. It’s hard to tackle these burdens alone. A support group, personal coach, professional counselor or other expert resources will be very valuable in reminding you that 1) you are not alone in your experiences or feelings and 2) there is a brighter future ahead for you – if you take proactive steps in that direction. While family and friends are usually very well intentioned, their support may not always be valuable for you. They have their own agendas,

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Parent/Child Communication – Even More C

Parent/Child Communication – Even More Crucial After Divorce!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC It’s no secret that one of the biggest challenges a parent faces after divorce is staying in good communication with your children. Obviously all parents struggle with communication issues as their children grow, but children who have had their lives dramatically altered by separation or divorce need even more attention – and diligent observation by their parents. Children tend not to tell you when they are angry, resentful, confused, hurt or depressed. Instead they reflect their problems through their behavior – acting out or perhaps turning inward in ways that you have not experienced prior to the divorce. Here are some tips that most all professionals agree about as ways to encourage positive and productive communication between you and your children. Many of these are obvious or innate behaviors. However, others can easily be forgotten amid the challenges you are juggling in your own life on

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Children and Divorce: 5 Keys To Help You...

Children and Divorce: 5 Keys To Help Your Kids Thrive
Make smart parenting decisions after divorce. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC No one plans to get divorced. But more than one million children in the U.S. will experience its affects this year alone. Divorce has become relatively mainstream in our culture, but that doesn’t make it easier for the parents or children involved. Consequently, innocent kids are coping with the consequences every day. The good news is that divorce need not wound and scar your children if you put their emotional and psychological needs first when making crucial decisions. It’s misguided parents – angry, resentful, hurt and mistrusting – who unintentionally set their children up for painful outcomes. These parents don’t understand that every decision they make regarding their divorce will affect the wellbeing of their children in countless ways. The emotional scars are not only harder to see, they’re also much harder to erase. Here are

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Divorce Books Helpful For Children of Di...

Divorce Books Helpful For Children of Divorce
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC We all know that divorce is one of the most traumatic events that can happen in a child’s life. Many people have written books on the subject to guide parents through the maze of challenges that are inevitable at this time. However, it is much more difficult communicating with children directly about divorce. There are a few books on the market written especially for children. None of them are one size fits all. So parents must read through each one to determine which book speaks most clearly to their own family situation. The age and gender of the children, relationship between the divorced parents, custodial agreements and other factors all influence how effective any one children’s book will be for any family. Karen Stanton has written and illustrated a new book: Monday, Wednesday And Every Other Weekend. It’s a gentle and accessible story about dealing with

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Divorced Parents: Compassionate Communic...

Divorced Parents: Compassionate Communication With Your kids Is  Crucial For a Happier Outcome!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During and after divorce your children may be hyper-sensitive about many things. What may have formerly been routine conversations, questions or activities can now be touchy subjects fraught with anxiety, resentment or ager. This is understandable when you consider that the stability of the world they knew has been dramatically altered. Minor insecurities can easily grow into major problems. Children may regress in their behaviors and skills, become more clinging – or more aloof – depending on their adaptability and perspective about the divorce. This is a time to master the art of good parent/child ommunication so you can reinforce or rebuild trust, security and confidence that things will be okay again – despite the changes inflicted by your divorce. Here are some solid tips for more effective communication with your children. Master them today and they will work on your behalf for years and years ahead.   Keep your conversations private – at times when

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Interview with Rosalind Sedacca, CDC — F

Interview with Rosalind Sedacca, CDC — Founder of the  Child-Centered Divorce Network
Rosalind Sedacca, CCT, Founder of Child-Centered Divorce Networki What is a Child-Centered Divorce – and how is that different from more typical divorces? Unfortunately, too many parents approach divorce as adversaries. When child custody becomes a battle, everyone loses. Parents are pitted against each other and innocent children inevitably pay the price. When custodial decisions move into contention, creating a scenario where lawyers, legislation and courts determine the direction of your children’s future, you not only lose power in your life, you lose harmony within your already fragile family structure. When you create a Child-Centered Divorce, your children win – on every level because you put their real needs first and foremost. Parents who make a concerted effort to sit down with each other and discuss the future wellbeing of their kids together, keep their perspective where it really belongs – on the children. Most parents

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Holiday Coping Tips For Divorced Parents...

Holiday Coping Tips For Divorced Parents Who Are Apart From Their Children
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC One of the saddest consequences of divorce for parents is the alone-time when your children are visiting their other parent. While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome respite for an overscheduled single parent, that’s not always the case. For many parents the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. This is especially so during the holiday season which can become a particularly challenging time – made even more difficult when friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. It’s really important for parents who are alone during the winter holidays to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This time of year can also be an opportunity to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding friends and activities that bring joy into your life on a personal level rather than a

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Parents: Give Children of Divorce Specia...

Parents: Give Children of Divorce Special Holiday Attention
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC For divorcing and divorced parents the holiday season can be especially stressful, pressure-filled and overwhelming. But you’re not alone. For children facing their parents’ divorce or who are experiencing their first holiday season post-divorce, this can be an especially tough time of year. For that reason all parents and extended family members who want to protect kids caught in the consequences of a divorce, need to be especially mindful and compassionate during the weeks ahead. It doesn’t take much to give a child or a teen a joyous experience spending time with you. You don’t need expensive gifts or trips to exotic places. Doing things together is what counts most. Sledding, ice skating, baking, creating crafts, watching movies, visiting a children’s museum, taking a short railroad trip, building a snowman, making a family video, adopting a pet from a local shelter, volunteering to wrap gifts for

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