Kids These Days: Issues Facing America’s

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The ninth International Child-Centered Divorce Month is being commemorated once again in January. The entire month is devoted to alerting parents about the effects of divorce on children – especially the impact of parental decisions on their children’s well-being during and long after a divorce. Divorce attorneys, mediators, therapists, financial planners, coaches, parenting experts and other professionals around the world are providing free gifts to parents that offer advice and insights to help them best cope with divorce and parenting issues. Our Family Wizard, an online resource providing shared custody calendars and visitation schedules for co-parents, has stepped up to sponsor ICCD Month activities. More divorces are filed in January, following the holiday season, than in any other month. That’s why Rosalind Sedacca, Divorce & Parenting Coach and founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network, chose January to commemorate ICCD Month each year. The goal is to educate parents about how

Child-Centered Divorce

Parent/Child Communication – even more vital Post-Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT It’s no secret that one of the biggest challenges a parent faces after divorce is maintaining good communication with your children. Obviously all parents struggle with communication issues as their children grow, but children who have had their lives dramatically altered by separation or divorce need even more attention – and diligent observation by their parents. Children tend not to tell you when they are angry, resentful, confused, hurt or depressed. Instead they reflect their problems through their behavior – acting out or perhaps turning inward in ways that you have not experienced prior to the divorce. Here are some tips that most all professionals agree about as ways to encourage positive and productive communication between you and your children. Many of these are obvious or innate behaviors. Some can easily be forgotten amid the challenges you are juggling in your own life on a daily

Parenting After Divorce

In January, once again divorce professionals around the globe will unite for International Child-Centered Divorce Month. Our goal is to educate parents about how to prevent negative consequences for children during and after separation or divorce. More divorces take place in January than any other month because parents wait until after the holidays to make the split. Throughout January divorce attorneys, mediators, therapists, financial planners, coaches, and other professionals will be sharing their insights to help parents make the best decisions regarding their children's well-being when coping with divorce issues. In North America, Europe, Australia, Africa, Asia and beyond divorce experts will be announcing teleseminars, workshops, and other activities designed for divorced parents and those contemplating divorce. In addition, parents will be invited to download free gifts -- ebooks, audio and video presentations, professional services and other perks from a growing roster of child-centered divorce experts. We have created a special

Child-Centered Divorce

Two Challenges Children Face During and After Your Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Whether your divorce is pending or five years behind you, your children continue to process the reality according to their age and level of understanding. There are several concepts that cause the most emotional turmoil for children. Being aware of these sensitive areas can help parents address these issues more effectively. As your children age they may revisit your divorce with more questions, confusion or insecurity. That’s why it’s essential that you have answers ready based on a keen understanding of how children internalize a divorce – even long after it’s over. There are two major concepts that can create the most emotional pain for children. The first has to do with blame and the second with unrealistic expectations. Here are some suggestions for handling these common challenges. Children keep blaming themselves for the divorce – even after it’s over! Regardless of what their parents may

Parenting After Divorce

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Emotional Effects of Conflict on Children of Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Fighting around the children does more damage to them than divorce itself. A study published in the Journal of Research on Adolescence* shows that children exposed to constant parental bickering are more likely to be depressed. They are also more prone to expressing other “problem behaviors,” including substance abuse, aggression and poor school grades. Never battle where kids can see or hear you. Little ears can pick up phone conversations as well as conflict behind closed bedroom doors. Parents often don't think about the psychological impact of their arguments on children. It changes who they are and how they feel about themselves and life in general. Never lie or play one parent off the other to win your child’s favors. Telling lies about, bashing or demeaning your former spouse confuses, hurts and angers children in serious ways. Keep personal resentments personal and don’t use your kids

Parenting After Divorce

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How to Talk to Your Kids When They are Upset About Your Divorce

A Guest Post by Ben Stich The last thing divorced or separated parents want is for their kids to be hurt by their break-up any more than necessary. There is nothing worse for a parent than to see their child in pain. Yet, it is almost inevitable that the kids will experience some level of pain, disappointment and confusion. Human nature being what it is, it is normal for divorced parents to have difficulty tolerating their children’s distress. As a result, some conversations between an anxious soon-to-be divorced mother and her upset son go something like this: Parent: What’s wrong, honey? Son: Why do you have to get divorced? I hate it! Parent: It’s going to be, OK. Son: (Sniffling). But, but… Parent: Don’t worry, everything will be OK. Son: OK, Mommy. At first blush, it seems like this mother did a nice job of reassuring her child, right? No!

Guest Experts

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Being a Step Parent is a Privilege, Not a Right!

A Guest Post by Anne Sleeman, President, Kids on Time, Inc. It's a funny thing, becoming a step parent. Not sure if I have ever heard of anyone who said, "When I grow up, I really want to be a step parent". For whatever the reason, being a step mom is that one step further away from anything anyone ever dreamed of. I mean the negative depictions of the evil step mom are enough to frighten off even the boldest and the bravest of soles. What's even more "funny" is that moment when you come to the realization that you are in fact in love with a person who has kids. Whoa. Okay. Breathe. Time to assess what this means for me, for them, and most importantly for the kids who are involved. Every family and every situation is different. I cannot speak of every situation, but I will speak

Guest Experts, Parenting After Divorce

Tips for Re-bonding with Children for Parents Alienated After Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Children can easily and subtly be influenced by both parents during and after divorce. Sometimes the influence is intentional. Other times parents may not be aware of how they are manipulating their children’s affection and allegiance toward themselves and away from their other parent. Either way, the damage for children can be significant, especially in regards to maintaining a loving connection with both parents when the divorce is over. Here’s some sound advice for parents who feel targeted for alienation and want to re-establish or keep a healthy parent-child relationship: • Keep in contact with your children in every possible way. Use video, texts, email and other technology to stay in touch, even on the most basic level. • Maintain your personal power regarding scheduling activities and contact with the children. Don’t passively enable your kids or your ex to dictate terms and conditions. • Create

Parenting After Divorce

Celebrity Divorces: Lessons we can learn about Co-Parenting!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT In today’s world Hollywood celebrities are major role models in our culture, especially to the younger generation. For that reason I keep an eye on the movie-star set to see what they’re doing in their relationships. It always makes for great conversation within the Child-Centered Divorce community. Too often the examples we see are poor ones. So many celebrity relationships end in ugly divorces and child-custody suits. Happily, however, there are some admirable exceptions. These couples are stepping up to taking more responsibility for their behaviors before and after the divorce. They are talking about the issues affecting their children and seem more aware than in the past about the consequences for children when a divorce gets nasty. Singer/actress Jennifer Lopez is a prime example. She was quoted during her divorce saying, "I feel very proud of the way we're handling it. I really do. We

Parenting After Divorce

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Kids These Days: Issues Facing America’s

January is International Child-Centered ...

Parent/Child Communication – even more v

Announcing INTERNATIONAL CHILD-CENTERED ...

Two Challenges Children Face During and ...

Emotional Effects of Conflict on Childre...

How to Talk to Your Kids When They are U...

Being a Step Parent is a Privilege, Not ...

Tips for Re-bonding with Children for Pa...

Celebrity Divorces: Lessons we can learn...

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