Moving through or beyond Divorce?

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Posts in category parenting after divorce

Divorced Parents: Effective Communica...

Divorced Parents: Effective Communication Is Key to Co-Parenting Success
[caption id="attachment_2796" align="alignleft" width="158"] Children affected by Divorce[/caption] By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC While divorce may end a marriage, when you’re a parent it doesn’t end the need for working together on behalf of your children. How you communicate with one another about parenting issues will affect your children today and for years to come. Here are some tips on keeping communication with your Ex as effective as possible. Communicate in writing  Use online co-parenting tools such as MoietyApp.com to schedule co-parenting appointments and keep clear records of all conversations, notes, memos, and details. Avoid in-person or telephone talk if there is growing conflict. Writing enables you to express yourself clearly and succinctly. Emails, texts and faxes record dates and time which can also be useful. Focus on the present and the future      Communication is not about re-hashing old wounds and arguments. Focus on the issues at hand keeping

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Divorced Parents’ 10 Biggest Pa...

Divorced Parents’ 10 Biggest Parenting Mistakes To Avoid!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Some parents think once they are divorced and most of the decisions have been made, the worst is behind them. Unfortunately, parenting after divorce is a week by week experience. Your success depends on the decisions you make, your attitude toward your situation and your compassion for your innocent children. You may have heard it all before, but smart parents quiz themselves regularly to see if they are not falling into some of the traps of destructive post-divorce parenting. If you find yourself making any of these mistakes, it’s never too late to make amends. You may have to alter decisions, change some behaviors, give yourself an attitude adjustment and even apologize to your children – or to their other parent! Keep in mind, we all make mistakes that we regret. It’s part of the learning process – especially when we’re parents. It’s far better to

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Raising Healthy, Well-Adjusted Childr...

Raising Healthy, Well-Adjusted Children – Despite Divorce
[caption id="attachment_2677" align="alignleft" width="150"] Co-parenting & single parenting after divorce[/caption] Amy Sherman, LMHC is one of the contributors to my internationally-acclaimed book, How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook Guide to Preparing Your Children -- with Love! Today she shares some of her wisdom based on her private practice and years of working with pre-teen and teen populations.  Parenting is a continual learning process, which is compounded when you are going through a divorce. Not only does it require an understanding of the child’s needs and the skills to meet those needs, but it requires additional special attention. Talking to your children about the divorce could be one of the most difficult experiences of parenting, because you want, of course, your wisdom to be heard and then your child to apply it. From my work with divorced parents and their children, I have gained much insight

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Moiety App is a Free Online Schedulin...

Moiety App is a Free Online Scheduling Tool That Supports Co-Parenting Success!
[caption id="attachment_3312" align="alignleft" width="150"] MoietyApp.com[/caption] By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  Sometimes life experience becomes the catalyst for innovation in unexpected ways. Gregory Wagner, with an MBA in Finance from Fordham University and a Certification in Innovation and Strategy from Harvard Business School, is a 22-year former wall-street veteran. He has held various senior and global roles throughout his career including Global Head of Prime Services for the Royal Bank of Scotland in the UK. After his divorce he became a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) as well. Greg well understood that promoting cooperation and minimizing conflict are important goals for all co-parents following divorce. So he challenged himself to the task of creating a new online app devoted to simplifying and solidifying the co-parenting process. The result is the Moiety App, considered to be the next generation in co-parenting technology. Its goal is to help parents deal with complicated family schedules

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Alone For the Holidays: Support For D...

Alone For the Holidays: Support For Divorced Parents
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC One of the saddest consequences of divorce for parents is the alone-time when your children are visiting their other parent. While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome respite for an overscheduled single parent, for other parents the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. The holiday season can be a particularly challenging time, especially when friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. It’s really important for parents who are alone during the winter holidays to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This can also be an opportunity to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding friends and activities that bring joy into your life. Among the greatest challenges for divorced parents is avoiding self-pity. Overwhelmed by a sense of isolation, or feeling undervalued as a parent, can often result

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Parents: Preserving Family Photos Ess...

Parents: Preserving Family Photos Essential For Children of Divorce
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  I read a poignant comment on a blog recently, written by a married mother of three. She was a child of divorce whose father moved out of the home when she was four. She talks about having very few pictures of herself as a child and only one of her mother and father together. Her grandfather found and gave her the photo just a few years ago. She framed it and has proudly displayed it in her home for her own children to see. She talks about how special that one photo of her with Mom and Dad is to her. It shows a little girl sitting happily on a lawn with her “real” family – before the divorce. This woman grieves that she has no other photographs of her father and so few pictures of her childhood. She assumes that her mother hid or destroyed

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Children of Divorce Deserve Special H...

Children of Divorce Deserve Special Holiday Attention
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC We all know the holiday season is fraught with stress, overwhelm and pressure for parents. But we are not alone. For children facing their parents’ divorce or who are experiencing their first holiday season post-divorce, this can be an especially tough time of year. So I reach out to all parents, and extended family members, who want to protect children caught in the consequences of a divorce, to be especially mindful and compassionate during the weeks ahead. It doesn’t take much to give a child or a teen a joyous occasion spending time with you. You don’t need expensive gifts or trips to exotic places. Doing things together are what count most. Sledding, ice skating, baking, creating crafts, watching a movie, visiting a children’s museum, taking a short railroad trip, building a snowman, making a family video, adopting a pet from a local shelter, volunteering to

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Child Centered Parenting in a Blended...

Child Centered Parenting in a Blended Family – Hers, Mine and the Exes
  My soon-to-be second wife and I are raising four children. With our wedding date quickly approaching, I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to have a successful blended family, and how we deal with our exes for the good of our children. Out of the Mouths of Babes It’s 3:00 AM and I can’t sleep. I keep hearing the voices of our kids, over and over in my head. “Mommy is going to be mad if we stay up late.” “My dad lets me watch that show.” “She’s not our sister!” “I don’t want to come to the wedding.” That last one stings. We have four parents in this equation. All with different views on what’s best for our children. It can be stressful. It can be annoying. Ultimately our success is not judged by our personal comfort, but by the experience of our children. Here are some

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6 Proven Co-Parenting Strategies for ...

6 Proven Co-Parenting Strategies for Divorced Parents
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC While moving through divorce can seem like an insurmountable obstacle, for many parents it is just the beginning of a new and equally intimidating challenge: co-parenting your children. Hats off to all of you who have chosen to remain in your children’s lives as co-parents. It means both of you care deeply about your children and want to continue raising them in the least-disruptive possible manner. Of course not all parents can share the parenting process in this way and for some couples it is not realistic to even attempt it. But those divorced parents who choose to live relatively close to one another so as not to disturb the school, sports and other related schedules of their children, certainly deserve credit and acknowledgement. This is a complex topic that can’t be glossed over with a few simple how-tos. It is based on sincere levels of

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7 Ways to Support the Grandparent-Gra...

7 Ways to Support the Grandparent-Grandchild Relationship After Divorce!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When divorce takes place, everyone in the family is affected. Often the impact on grandparents is overlooked amidst the turmoil involving parents and children. But the affect can be devastating for grandparents who want to help and also stay in the lives of the children they love. Grandparents frequently ask me, “How do I help and stay close to my grandkids when we are geographically separated?” Even more challenging, how do you cope as grandparents when the consequences of divorce limits or ends physical visits with the grandkids? You do that by maintaining and strengthening the relationship you already have using the technology available and your best communication skills with your grown child’s former spouse. When possible, ask permission to continue the relationship with the kids when they are with the “Ex.” Let them know how much it means to you and how important it is for

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