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Child Centered Divorce

The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent

Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

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Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays...

Divorced Parents: Alone For the Holidays Is Especially Tough!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Are you facing alone time without the kids this holiday season? Often that’s one of the saddest consequences of divorce when you’re a parent. What do you do when your children are visiting their other parent? While short-term periods when the kids are away can be a welcome break for an overscheduled single parent, for others the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. It can be particularly challenging when your friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. Don’t sink into despair. It’s really important at this time to get creative and absorbed in activities that you find personally fulfilling. This can become an ideal time to reflect on meeting your own needs and finding new people, activities and events that bring joy into your life. Avoid the pity party! Among the greatest challenges for divorced parents is avoiding self-pity.

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5 Ways To Keep Divorce From Scarring You...

5 Ways To Keep Divorce From Scarring Your Kids!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce need not wound and scar your children if you put their emotional and psychological needs first when making crucial decisions. Some parents don’t understand that every decision they make regarding their divorce will affect the wellbeing of their children in countless ways. The emotional scars are not only harder to see, they’re also much harder to erase. Here are five keys to helping your children move through and thrive after divorce. Remind them this is not their fault.  Children tend to blame themselves for divorce, no matter how bad their parents’   relationship has been. The younger the child, the more likely this is so. But even teens feel guilt related to the divorce. Sit down together and talk to your children, emphasizing that they are in no way at fault. You can say something like: “As your parents we’re having problems getting along and agreeing

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6 Key Questions When Children of Divorce...

6 Key Questions When Children of Divorce  Resist Their Other Parent
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parenting after divorce is always challenging, especially when your children act out. One big issue is handling children if they resist spending time with their other parent. Many factors come into play. Here are 6 crucial questions to ask yourself which can help you determine the source of the problem and understand the reasons why your children are resisting contact with their other parent. Are they feeling guilty or disloyal about leaving your presence? This can easily influence how they react to visits or time away living with their other parent. Have they been privy to information, slurs or other comments that make them dislike their other parent? Do they hear you complain about that parent to family or friends? Are they being raised in an environment hostile towards that parent? Has their other parent been mistreating them or disciplining them in a different way than

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9 Tips For Parents When You’re Dating Af

9 Tips For Parents When You’re Dating After Divorce!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC It’s no surprise that jumping into dating after a divorce can be difficult. But dating after a divorce when you have children can be even harder. That’s because your entire perspective on relationships changes after having children. Now you aren't only looking for someone to spend your time with. You are looking for someone to be an adult role model for your children, as well, complicating many of your decisions. Here are 9 important tips to grasp before you start socializing after divorce when you’re a parent. Be open and honest with first dates. Let them know you have children, their general age range and whether they are living with you. This isn’t information you should hide. Being single with children is an important factor that impacts any dating relationship. You also want to find out how your date feels about children and whether they, too,

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5 Ways To Handle A Negative Co-Parent

5 Ways To Handle A Negative Co-Parent
Anger-Conflict Programs for Co-Parenting & Other Life Challenges By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Are you trying to cope with a negative, confrontational co-parent after your divorce or breakup? It can be enormously challenging at best. Most people acknowledge that staying positive and “taking the high road” is the best way to handle difficult people. But that’s much easier said than done. It’s tough to stay positive when your co-parent exudes negativity toward you with every encounter. Repeated contact with the same stressful outcome will inevitably bring you down. It also drains your energy, bombarding your consciousness with self-doubt and insecurity. A negative, argumentative or disrespectful co-parent can be especially challenging when you are trying to be a positive role model for your children. It’s important to remember: we can’t change other people, much as we would like to. This is particularly true for difficult people who are

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5 Smart Ways To Strengthen Your Parent-C...

5 Smart Ways To Strengthen Your Parent-Child Connection After Divorce
parenting after divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Sadly, divorce is a time when we experience disconnection. We disconnect from our former spouse. Too often we often have to disconnect from time spent with our children as well. That’s why it is important for you to strengthen your bond with your children. Find ways of strengthening or at least maintaining your connections during this challenging period of transition. This is equally true, when you are living with your children as well as when you are apart. That’s the basis of a Child-Centered Divorce. Children want and NEED to know they are still loved, valued and cared about. Show them, tell them and keep in close communication with them – during the happy times and the sad ones. They need to feel they have a safe place to turn, a shoulder to cry on and a non-judgmental ear

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Do You Have Anger Issues Triggered By Yo...

Do You Have Anger Issues Triggered By Your Divorce or Relationship?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC We all get angry when we believe we are being wronged, misunderstood or unjustly accused. It’s a natural reaction to circumstances that put us on the defensive. For many, divorce is the perfect storm that triggers all our anger issues. When we’re parents and cannot manage our anger, it can take over our lives and affect the wellbeing of our children. Focusing our anger on our divorcing spouse can fuel the fire to dangerous levels for everyone involved. Anger is a feeling that alerts us that something is wrong. What we fail to understand is that we, as human beings, always have choicesregarding how we act regarding those feelings. Acting before thinking can lead to mismanaged anger.Once we have reacted to anger, we have allowed our feelings to control us. This can lead to actions and behaviors we never would have taken if we were making

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Back To School After Divorce: 5 Tips Par...

Back To School After Divorce: 5 Tips Parents Need To Know!
Divorce hard for children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Not surprisingly, many divorces take place during the spring and summer. This gives families time to adapt to the changes ahead. But it also makes returning to school a challenge for many children of divorce. Here are suggestions for parents to help ease the transition by tapping into the many resources available through the school. That’s why it’s wise to develop a cooperative relationship with key school personnel. Before school starts it’s wise to inform your child’s teachers about the divorce and any changes in your home environment. The more aware they are, the better prepared they can be to help your child. After all, school is often a second home for children – and that may be very comforting during this time of changes and uncertainty.   Be Alert For Deep Feelings & Raw Emotions You can’t expect

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Divorced Parent Coping With Stress? Self...

Divorced Parent Coping With Stress? Self-care Is Essential!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC There are days – yes, weeks and months – when life can seem awfully low. Often overbearing. The weight can seem just too much to carry. Life challenges related to divorce frequently play a part in these circumstances. And when you’re a divorced parent at the same time … well, you know how it feels! Just know, as well, that you’re not alone. Parenting is tough for everyone, even under the best of circumstances. Parenting through and beyond divorce takes enormous focus and a continuous need for compassion, both for yourself and your children. If you take it day by day, you will find the strength and even the wisdom to make decisions that tap into your innate wisdom and love for your children. But it’s also essential to parent and nurture yourself at the same time. Take a tip from the

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5 Steps To Better Communication With You...

5 Steps To Better Communication With Your Children –  For A Better Divorce Outcome!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During and after divorce your children may be hyper-sensitive about many things. What may have formerly been routine conversations, questions or activities can now be touchy subjects fraught with anxiety, resentment or ager. This is understandable when you consider that the stability of the world they knew has been dramatically altered. Minor insecurities can easily grow into major problems. Children may regress in their behaviors and skills, become more clinging – or more aloof – depending on their adaptability and perspective about the divorce.   This is a time to master the art of good parent/child communication so you can reinforce or rebuild trust, security and confidence that things will be okay again – despite the changes inflicted by your divorce.   Here are some solid tips for more effective communication with your children. Master them today and they will work on your behalf for years

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