Parents: Why It’s Vital To Let Go Of Gru

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Gandhi Divorce can be a major stumbling block to our happiness and personal growth. Holding grudges and resentments have been proven to be harmful to your physical health and emotional well-being – not to mention the psychological effects on your children. Forgiveness is a productive way to move forward, detach from the past and let go of lingering hurts so you can experience a healthier, more promising future – and protect your children from toxic parenting. It is not uncommon to resent your ex or other people closest to you because they have often done us some harm such as violating our trust through a lie, betrayal, deceit or abuse. However, resentment comes at a big cost to you. When you can’t let go of hurt and anger, it builds into a resentment or

Parenting After Divorce

Grandparents: Smart Ways To Help Your Grandchildren Cope With Their Parents’ Divorce!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Grandparents are often caught in the tensions between parents when divorce takes place. Eager to help ease the situation, many grandparents are confused about how they can play a part in addressing the pain, confusion and other emotional issues that may be affecting their innocent grandkids. Since every divorce is unique there are no cookie-cutter solutions that do the trick. But there are some guidelines to keep in mind, especially in regards to being there for your grandchildren. If you haven’t been close to the kids beforehand, post-divorce is a difficult time to develop a relationship. But if you already have that bond established, it’s important to keep the on-going connection at this time when the children are facing so many unknowns. When communication and trust are strong between you and your grandchildren it’s easier to bring up issues that concern you for a chat. Children

Parenting After Divorce

Picture this: you’re getting divorced and you’re angry, resentful, hurt, or any combination of other painful emotions. You want to lash out at, or maybe get back at your soon to be former spouse. Hiring the most aggressive divorce lawyer you can find seems like your smartest choice. You are gearing up for a fight! But stop. Think. If you are a parent, you may be making a choice you regret for a long time. If you choose a lawyer who directs you into a vicious court battle, the costs may be insurmountable – not only the financial expenses, but the emotional costs as well. Think long and hard before you move your divorce battle into the legal system. If you do that it is likely to take its toll on every member of your family – especially your children – in the most destructive and gut-wrenching ways. It happens

Child-Centered Divorce

Should You Divorce or Stay? Parents Must Put Kids First Either Way!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CLC Stay together for the sake of the kids? Generations of miserable parents followed that advice hoping their sacrifices would pay off for their children in the end. Many still believe that’s the only option for parents stuck in a dead-end marriage. Based on my own personal experience, I have another perspective. Having been raised by parents that chose to stay together in a miserable marriage, I opt in on the other side. For me, parental divorce is preferable to years of living in a home where parents fight, disrespect one another and children are surrounded by sadness and anger. That’s the world I grew up in and the scars are still with me today, many decades later. I believe that staying in a marriage only for the kids is a physical choice that doesn’t touch upon the emotional and psychological pain children endure when their parents

Child-Centered Divorce

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Do You Have an Anger Or Conflict Control Problem? Ask Yourself These Key Question and Find Out!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CLC We all get angry when we believe we are being wronged, misunderstood or unjustly accused. It’s a natural reaction to circumstances that put us on the defensive. But when we cannot identify or manage our anger, it can take over our lives and affect the wellbeing of those close to us. When our anger is focused on our relationship partners or a divorcing spouse, it can reach dangerous levels – especially when there are children involved. If managing anger has been a challenge for you, it is important to recognize signs to watch out for in your behavior. By identifying “red flag” warnings in advance, before you explode out of control, you can learn healthier ways of expressing anger, frustration and other difficult feelings, which will make for more peaceful and rewarding life experiences. Anger management issues need to be addressed before they destroy your life

Child-Centered Divorce, Relationship Advice

Color Through Divorce: A Therapeutic Coloring Book to Help Mom & Child Through Separation & Divorce

The first weeks and months after a separation or divorce can be quite challenging. With so many emotions -- especially anger, sadness and fear -- fighting for your attention, it's a wonder you make it through your day. To complicate matters even more, not only are you worried about yourself but you are worried about your kids too. What will the effects of divorce be on my child? Will I be able to help my child through my divorce? Will their behavior and grades be affected? What do I say if they get sad or mad? What if I don't know what to say at all? These and many more questions are probably swirling around your head. They were swirling around my head when I faced my divorce and most every parent has the same concerns. Sara Woodard-Ortiz is no different. After finding out that her husband had been cheating

Child-Centered Divorce

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Parenting Yourself Through Divorce To Better Protect Your Children

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce is a life-altering experience that takes its toll on your physical, mental and spiritual wellbeing. Its ramifications not only turn your own world upside down, but can also seriously affect your innocent children – a dire consequence we all want to avoid. Since divorce is a process, often a lengthy one, there are days – yes, weeks and months – when life can seem awfully low. Often overbearing. The weight can seem just too much to carry. The many life changes related to divorce can play a part in these difficult circumstances. And when you’re a parent at the same time … well, you know how it feels! Just know, as well, that you’re not alone. Parenting is tough for everyone, even under the best of circumstances. Parenting through and beyond divorce takes enormous focus and a continuous need for compassion, both for yourself and

Child-Centered Divorce

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New Year … New Divorce Challenges. Are You Protecting Your Children?

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Statistics bear it out. Every January the number of couples filing for divorce rises dramatically. And while the divorce rate has gone down the past few years, because of the economy, January is still the month with the highest divorce rate. When you think about it, the reason comes as no surprise. Many couples considering splitting decide to wait until after the holidays to break the news to their children. Others wait to take advantage of year-end job bonuses, if they come, so they’ll have the extra funds to cover attorney, moving and other related expenses. Regardless, it’s not the why that should be concerning us at this time – it’s the how. How are divorcing parents going to approach their separation or divorce – and how will it affect their innocent children? I, too, planned my separation at this time of year more than a

Parenting After Divorce

Emotional Effects of Conflict on Children of Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT Fighting around the children does more damage to them than divorce itself. That’s why as parents we need to be diligent in monitoring our children as well as our own behavior to safeguard our kids from emotional and psychological damage. A study published in the Journal of Research on Adolescence* shows that children exposed to constant parental bickering are more likely to be depressed. They are also more prone to expressing other “problem behaviors,” including substance abuse, aggression and poor school grades. Here are some essential behaviors to avoid during and after divorce to protect your children from the negative effects of conflict on their psyches. Never battle where kids can see or hear you. Little ears can pick up phone conversations as well as conflict behind closed bedroom doors. Parents often don't think about the psychological impact of their arguments on children. It changes who they

Parenting After Divorce

Divorced? 4 Valuable Life Lessons to Help You Move On!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT The aftermath of divorce can be a sense of self-discovery or internment in a self-made prison of depression and resentment. It’s all about our acceptance of what is and determination to use the divorce as a pathway to a new and better life. The good news: it’s all up to us. We can create an attitude of positive expectation or we can subjugate ourselves to months and years of self-pity and despair down the road. The bad news: it’s not always easy to change our attitude or perspective on life. But if you do, you’ll be rewarded with a happier future for yourself as well as your children. Here are some vital steps to embracing your divorce as a catalyst to a brighter future. Boost your self-esteem. One of the most damaging effects of divorce can be a toll on your self-esteem, especially if you were

Relationship Advice

Parents: Why It’s Vital To Let Go Of Gru

Grandparents: Smart Ways To Help Your Gr...

Creating a Child-Centered Divorce: A Wak...

Should You Divorce or Stay? Parents Must...

Do You Have an Anger Or Conflict Control...

Color Through Divorce: A Therapeutic Col...

Parenting Yourself Through Divorce To Be...

New Year … New Divorce Challenges. Are Y

Emotional Effects of Conflict on Childre...

Divorced? 4 Valuable Life Lessons to Hel...

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