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Child Centered Divorce
The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent
Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC
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What If Your Kids Resist Divorce Visits ...

What If Your Kids Resist Divorce Visits With Their Other Parent?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parenting after divorce is always challenging, especially when your children act out. One big issue is handling children if they resist visitation with their other parent. Many factors come into play when this occurs. Here are some questions to ask yourself which can help you determine the source of the problem. They’ll also help you understand the reasons why your children are resisting post-divorce contact with their other parent. For simplification purposes, I’m using Dad as the example. However, this happens to fathers and mothers alike depending on their prior and post-divorce relationships. Questions for parental self-reflection Are the kids feeling guilty or disloyal when leaving your presence? This can easily influence their feelings toward spending time with their Dad. Have they been privy to information, slurs or other comments that make them dislike their Dad? Do they hear you complain about him to family or

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Breaking The Divorce News? 5 Pitfalls To...

Breaking The Divorce News? 5 Pitfalls To Avoid When Telling Kids!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Facing divorce and stymied about how to tell your kids? Wondering how it will affect them? Worried about hurting them with the news? When’s the best time to talk? What to say and not say? How they will respond? Not sure just what to confide?  Well, you’re not alone. There’s no doubt this might be one of the most difficult conversations you’ll ever have. It’s a talk your children won’t want to have – and you must be prepared. 5 Big Mistakes To Avoid Here are the five mistakes most commonly made by parents. Be sure you don’t add stress to your children’s lives by making these errors. 1. Exposing your children to parental conflict. That not only includes fighting. Bad-mouthing their other parent, eye-rolling, sarcasm and other disrespectful behavior or remarks count too. Studies show that this does more damage to children than any other

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4 Ways Parental Anger and Conflict Harm ...

4 Ways Parental Anger and Conflict Harm Children of Divorce
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Does parental anger affect children of divorce? Studies repeatedly show that fighting around the children does more damage to them than divorce itself. That’s why as parents we need to be diligent in monitoring our children as well as our own behavior. So, we can safeguard our kids from emotional and psychological damage. Exposure to conflict can change a child’s self-image and sense of security. It impacts their concept of the world and their ability to trust others. The consequences can last a lifetime. A study published in the Journal of Research on Adolescence* shows that children exposed to constant parental bickering are more likely to be depressed. They are also more prone to expressing other “problem behaviors,” including substance abuse, aggression and poor school grades. Some children regress back to bed-wetting, thumb sucking or limiting social contact. Others move into bullying, acting out and thoughts

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Parents: 5 Crucial Tips For Talking To K...

Parents: 5 Crucial Tips For Talking To Kids  During & After Divorce
Communication with your child is essential. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During and after divorce your children may be hypersensitive about many things. What may have formerly been routine conversations are no longer that. Questions or activities can now be touchy subjects fraught with anxiety, resentment or ager. This is understandable when you consider that the stability of the world they knew has been dramatically altered. Minor insecurities can easily grow into major problems. Children may regress in their behaviors and skills. They may become more clinging, aggressive or more aloof – depending on their adaptability and perspective about the divorce. This is a time to master the art of good parent/child communication. Time to reinforce or rebuild trust, security and confidence that things will be okay again despite the changes inflicted by your divorce. Here are some solid tips for more effective communication with your children.

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Divorced? 5 Valuable Life Lessons to Mas...

Divorced? 5 Valuable Life Lessons to Master Now
parenting after divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce affects everyone differently and its impact lingers with us for different periods of time. But there’s one thing that never changes: the aftermath of divorce can be a sense of self-discovery or internment in a self-made prison of depression and resentment. What influences us the most is how well we accept what is and our determination to use the divorce as a pathway to a new and better life. The good news: it’s all up to us. We can create an attitude of positive expectation or we can subjugate ourselves to months and years of self-pity and despair down the road. The bad news: it’s not always easy to change our attitude or perspective on life. But if you do, you’ll be rewarded with a happier future for yourself as well as your children. Here are some vital

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21 Questions For Divorcing Parents Befor...

21 Questions For Divorcing Parents Before Fighting Over the Kids
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Larry Sarezky is a Family Law attorney with a strong, child-centered focus, which is why I so value and respect his work. He tells me his biggest fear, as a divorce lawyer, is that thousands of children are growing up wondering why the “grown-ups” didn’t protect them from their parents’ high conflict divorces. As Founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network for parents, I totally concur. When parents don’t take responsibility for their divorce actions and decisions, the outcomes can be pretty nasty, especially for their children. Sure, they try to justify and rationalize their behavior – but we know better. Parents have CHOICES every step of the way. The consequences of those choices can be damaging or supportive to your children. It depends where you put your attention. Crucial Questions To Answer Before you Battle ... Larry created a list of ten questions to ask clients

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Co-Parenting With An Addict After Divorc...

Co-Parenting With An Addict After Divorce: Advice For Both Parents!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Getting divorced and then co-parenting is especially challenging for parents who are coping with addiction issues. Or find themselves co-parenting with an addict. This is even more complicated if one or both parents are not fully dependable, trustworthy or responsible. 6 Challenges That Complicate the Co-Parenting  Experience Difficulties can be compounded by the many issues all parents face following a divorce. This includes one or both parents …   1)  Giving the raw emotions resulting from the divorce an active voice in this new stage in their lives. 2)  Bringing previous baggage from the marriage into play. Ongoing conflicts, differing styles of communication, unresolved issues and continual frustrations can hinder negotiating a co-parenting plan. 3)  Vying for the respect and love of the children. It can be tempting to make parenting decisions in ways that win them popularity with the kids. 4)  Letting anger and resentment

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Divorced Parents: Communicate Compassion...

Divorced Parents: Communicate Compassionately With Your Kids  For a Happier Outcome!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC   During and after divorce your children may be hyper-sensitive about many things. What may have formerly been routine conversations, questions or activities can now be touchy subjects fraught with anxiety, resentment or ager. This is understandable when you consider that the stability of the world they knew has been dramatically altered. Minor insecurities can easily grow into major problems. Children may regress in their behaviors and skills. Some become more clinging – others more aloof – depending on their adaptability and perspective about the divorce.   This is the time to focus on good parent/child communication. You can reinforce or rebuild trust, security and confidence that things will be okay again – despite the changes inflicted by your divorce.   Here are some solid tips for more effective communication with your children. Master them today and they will work on your behalf for years and

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Unraveling the Emotional Toll of Divorce...

Unraveling the Emotional Toll of Divorce on Your Children!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce can be devastating when you’re a parent. You can’t just crawl into a hole and grieve, rant or rage. You must still care for the wellbeing of your children. And sometimes this challenge is so overwhelming parents fail to cope with the responsibilities of parenting. When that happens, your children pay a high price. And very often, you may not be fully aware of how your kids are affected. It’s not always easy to remember that your children may be grieving as deeply as you are during and after divorce. It’s even more frightening for them because they were not responsible for the divorce. Nor are they aware of the complex dynamics that led up to the split. Their fears are compounded by apprehension about whether either parent may   ever divorce them. They fear what will happen to them and their family in the future.

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Parent/Child Communication Is Even More ...

Parent/Child Communication Is Even More Crucial After Divorce!
Communication with your child is essential. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC It’s no secret that one of the biggest challenges a parent faces after divorce is staying in good communication with your children. All parents struggle with communication issues as their children grow. However, children who have had their lives dramatically altered by separation or divorce need even more attention. Plus, diligent and consistent observation by their parents. Children tend not to tell you when they are angry, resentful, confused, hurt or depressed. Instead, they reflect their problems through their behavior. Often they will act out. Other kids may regress or turn inward in ways that you have not experienced prior to the divorce. Take time to see the world through your children’s eyes. You will be better able to meet their needs and understand their confusion or aggression. Then you can find appropriate ways to resolve

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