Skip to main content
Child Centered Divorce
The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent
Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC
Latino Children
Asian Children
African Children
Caucasian Children

Blog

Parents: Are You Damaging Your Kids When...

Parents: Are You Damaging Your Kids When You Fight?
Parents fight & kids suffer during divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  For years, as Founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network, I’ve been telling parents one crucial point. Fighting around the children is more damaging to them than divorce. Part of having an amicable divorce is giving your children’s psychological needs top priority when making all decisions. In that way you can avoid doing serious emotional harm to the kids. Many studies over the years supports this point, including several in the Journal of Research on Adolescence. Whether the focus of these studies is on fighting over financial issues, time-sharing, child-care or other related topics, the consequences are basically the same. Exposure to parental conflict psychologically damages your kids! The overall consensus is clear. Children exposed to constant parental bickering are more likely to be depressed. They are also more prone to expressing other “problem behaviors,” including

Read More

How To Keep Kids From Sabotaging Your Da...

How To Keep Kids From Sabotaging Your Dating After Divorce!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Dating after divorce can be challenging for many parents who have been out of the market for some time. But it’s even more challenging for your children. It’s only natural for them to be resistant to any new partner you bring into their lives. And sometimes they can be downright belligerent to keep you from dating post-divorce. No matter how much you love your kids, they can represent obstacles to your future love life. This is a reality whether your divorce was relatively painless or high conflict. As a parent you don’t want to create more emotional drama or trauma for your children. You want to protect them from unnecessary conflict and competition for your attention. When you introduce a new partner, especially one who may be a parental figure in the future, be prepared. It’s not surprising that kids will want to express their feelings,

Read More

Does Divorce Scar Children? Or Selfish P...

Does Divorce Scar Children? Or Selfish Parents?
Divorce catches kids in the middle By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce is a highly emotional topic. When children are involved, the consequences are far more dramatic. And not surprisingly, so are our opinions. I know many people sincerely believe that no divorce is a good divorce. They argue that children are always harmed by the physical and emotional separation of their parents. Therefore, parents should – for the sake of the kids – just stick it out. They should not consider divorce until the children are grown. This is a particularly prevalent view for many adult children of divorce. Too often they have experienced the dramatic life changes that come with divorce. Many feel permanently scarred as a result. That response is certainly understandable. But it’s not the final word on this subject. I have another perspective. It’s based on the experience of being raised in

Read More

Divorced Parents: Sharing Your Life Less...

Divorced Parents: Sharing Your Life Lessons Helps Your Children
Communication with your child is essential. By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC As a divorced parent, what lessons and behaviors are you modeling for your children? Bad things can happen to good people. Divorce is a prime example.  Good people get divorced. Responsible people who are loving parents get caught in the decision to end a loveless or deceitful marriage. The messages you convey will influence your children into adulthood. Here’s valuable advice on leaving a positive imprint on your innocent children.  Making Choices With Awareness The consequences of how you handle your divorce can either be life affirming or destroying. It depends on how each parent approaches this transition. Parents who are blinded by blame and anger are not likely to learn much through the experience. They see their former spouse as the total problem in their life. Consequently, they are convinced that getting rid of that

Read More

7 Keys To Boosting The Grandparent-Grand...

7 Keys To Boosting The Grandparent-Grandchild Bond After Divorce!
Grandparents - grandchildren - affected by divorce By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When divorce takes place, everyone in the family is affected. Often the impact on grandparents is overlooked amidst the turmoil involving parents and children. The results can be devastating for grandparents who want to be supportive and also stay in the lives of the children they love. Grandparents frequently wonder, “How can I help and stay close to my grandkids when we are geographically separated?” Even more challenging, how do you cope as grandparents when the consequences of divorce may limit or end physical visits with the grandkids? You do that in two important ways: 1) Maintain and strengthen the relationship you already have through available technology. 2) Use empathy and your best communication skills with your adult child’s former spouse. Talking to your daughter or son-in-law … If appropriate, ask permission to continue the relationship

Read More

Demonizing Divorce? What’s Best For YOUR

Demonizing Divorce? What’s Best For YOUR Kids?
The Divorce/Separation Path By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce is rarely an outcome married couples expect or anticipate. But marital strife can take its toll. For many, divorce is the chosen path for coping with relationship challenges. This makes divorce a rather controversial topic. Google the subject and you’ll find conflicting perspectives on every facet of divorce, especially when it comes to parenting issues. Of course that comes as no surprise to every mother and father who battled with the guilt, anxiety, fears and insecurities that rear up when contemplating divorce and its aftermath. As you know, the Child-Centered Divorce Network welcomes this kind of dialogue. I participate in many Summits and discussion groups. I comment on many blogs and write columns for several divorce and relationship websites. I offer my own advice and opinions on topics related to divorce and its effect on children. SHOULD WE

Read More

6 Reasons Pets Help Families Better Cope...

6 Reasons Pets Help Families Better Cope With Divorce!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Pets can be a helpful resource for you and your children when handling the challenges of divorce. If your family has one or more pets, let your children have access to them as much as they desire. Pets can provide great emotional benefits to kids during times of insecurity. Your children are fortunate that the pets they love can still be in their lives. Don’t hurt your children or your pet by discarding or giving the pet away during the divorce process and its aftermath. If you don’t already have a pet, I recommend getting one. However, that’s only if you are in a position to be responsible to that innocent animal during this time of additional stress in your life. If a family pet is out of the question, please consider giving your children time to play with the pets of friends and family. Take

Read More

6 Ways To Minimize How Divorce Affects Y...

6 Ways To Minimize How Divorce Affects Your Kids!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Communication with our children is always important. But never as essential as when they are impacted by separation or divorce. Children are vulnerable and easily frightened by changes in their routines. The more you talk to and comfort them, the less stress and anxiety they’ll experience. This is the time to reassure your children that you are taking care of matters and everyone in the family will be okay. Then, of course, take responsibility for doing what needs to be done to assure their wellbeing. Here are six important ways you can minimize the negative impact of divorce on your children. Equally important, these six steps will help them thrive during and after your divorce. Focus on following structure and normal routines! Strive to keep as much normalcy in your children’s lives as possible. Maintaining relationships with friends, family and neighbors provides a sense of stability

Read More

3 Steps To Rebuilding Your Self Esteem A...

3 Steps To Rebuilding Your Self Esteem After Divorce
Anger-Conflict Programs for Co-Parenting & Other Life Challenges By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce can be devastating on many levels. In addition to the financial and stress toll on both partners, it can easily wreak havoc on one’s self-esteem. Even those who initiate the divorce can experience tremendous emotional turmoil, consuming them with guilt, anxiety and insecurity. For those who were not expecting or didn’t want the break-up, the consequence can be even more difficult. Divorce can leave them feeling psychologically battered, confused and questioning their own worth. It’s hard to tackle these burdens alone. A support group, personal coach, professional counselor or other resource can be extremely helpful. It will remind you that you are not alone in your experiences or feelings. You’ll also find a path to a brighter future ahead for you – if you take proactive steps in that direction. While family and

Read More

5 Mindset Keys To More Positive Co-Paren...

5 Mindset Keys To More Positive Co-Parenting  (& a happier you) After Divorce!
Cooperative coparenting supports children By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  Parenting during and after divorce can be complex, frustrating and confusing. However, every day parents around the world cope with the challenges and raise happy, well-adjusted children. There are many factors that impact your effectiveness as a co-parent. Here are five that greatly influence your pre- and post-divorce co-parenting success.  Monitor Your Attitude  Attitude plays a crucial part in every facet of our lives. It’s especially important when we’re parenting after divorce. If you make a commitment to creating as positive an experience as possible, on behalf of the children you love, you are on your way to succeeding. What attitude are you conveying about your divorce? Try to catch your thoughts and the way you speak about it. Are you filled with negativity? Resentment? Fear? Are your days consumed with a “poor me” mindset? Are you attracting

Read More