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Child Centered Divorce
The caring support you need if you're a parent who's facing ... going through ... or moving on after divorce!
  - Divorce and Co-Parenting
  - Parenting Children of Divorce
  - Dating as a Divorced Parent
Created by Rosalind Sedacca, CDC
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Why YOU – Not A Divorce Judge – Should R

Why YOU – Not A Divorce Judge – Should Resolve Child Custody Disputes!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Judges and others in the divorce judicial system mean well. However, they are burdened with too many cases to unravel the complexities involved for each family. That leads to serious complications, injustice and errors. Consequently it is wise to do everything you can to stay out of court when settling child custody issues and disputes. Based on speaking to many family law attorneys I believe that situations work out best, long-term, when decisions are made by the parents themselves rather than being left to the legal system. Most parents continue to co-parent their children after divorce. Except for circumstances where children are at risk, both parents have the responsibility to put the their children first by working out a parenting plan that is in the children’s best interests. Having trouble agreeing on a plan that works for both parents and the kids? Remember: If you are

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Why YOU Should Resolve Child-Related Di...

Why YOU Should Resolve  Child-Related Divorce Disputes – Not a Judge!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Family-focused divorce attorney Larry Sarezky is passionate about keeping parents out of court when handling disputes over child custody. Based on decades of experience Larry knows that long-term outcomes work out better when the decisions are made by the parents themselves rather than left to the legal system. Most parents continue to co-parent their children after divorce. Except for circumstances where children are at risk, Larry strongly emphasizes that parents have the responsibility to put the their children first by working out a parenting plan that is in the children’s best interests. Larry’s message: If you are unable to resolve children’s issues with your co-parent, a judge will. There are some very good reasons to avoid that: The custody evaluation process can humiliate, frighten and compromise your children, and cause them enduring emotional harm. Custody cases are tremendously expensive. Parents must not only pay their own

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Is It Divorce – Or Parental Conflict – T

Is It Divorce – Or Parental Conflict – That Most Damages Children?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce catches kids in the middle So often I am asked: Is it divorce or parental discord that most damages children? More and more evidence points at the attitude of the parents being most influential on the outcome for innocent children. Many studies I've read about over the past decade all come to the agreement that children are more negatively impacted by parental conflict than by divorce itself.  Numerous articles by marriage and family therapist Ruth Bettelheim address this topic in ways that are both relevant and, quite surprising for many. That’s because she refutes common misconceptions about divorce and addresses the real issues of concern. According to Bettelheim, “Studies conducted in the past 20 years have shown that on all meaningful measures of success -- social, economic, intellectual and psychological -- most adult children from divorced families are no worse off

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What You Don’t Know About Divorcing As a

What You Don’t Know About Divorcing As a Parent That Can Hurt Your Kids!
Divorce catches kids in the middle January is International Child-Centered Divorce Month – a time when divorce filings are highest: after the holidays at the start of the New Year. In recognition of ICCD Month, international Divorce Coach, author and trainer, Rosalind Sedacca, CDC, has gathered family-focused divorce professionals throughout world to give away complimentary ebooks, courses, videos, coaching services and other valuable tools to help parents:   Make the best decisions regarding your children before, during and long after divorce. Avoid serious mistakes that negatively impact your children Learn how divorce affects children at different ages and stages Understand divorce options to choose the best course of action for both parents and children. With more than one million children impacted by divorce each year, why focus on Child-Centered Divorce in January? 5 Things You Don’t Know About Divorcing As a Parent That Can Hurt Your Kids!

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Divorcing or Divorced Parents: Why Janua...

Divorcing or Divorced Parents: Why January is such an important month for you!
January is International Child-Centered Divorce Month Join experts in commemorating Child-Centered Divorce Month In the U.S. today nearly 4 out of 10 first marriages end in divorce. Even more significant, 60% of divorcing couples have children, resulting in more than one million kids each year experiencing the divorce of their parents. The consequence of parental divorce takes its toll on everyone in the family. An estimated 25 million children (36%) live apart from their biological father with about 26% of absentee fathers living in a different state than their kids. Close to 17 million children (25%) are living with their single mothers. It may come as no surprise that more divorces are initiated in January than in any other month. A large majority of parents wait until after the holiday season before breaking the divorce news to their children. For this reason the Child-Centered Divorce Network

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Child Custody After Divorce – Are You Pu

Child Custody After Divorce – Are You Putting Your Children First?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC The Divorce/Separation Path Custody issues are a huge challenge in every divorce involving children. I am a strong advocate of co-parenting whenever possible. However, because every situation is different when it comes to divorce, I certainly don’t believe legislation should determine custody outcomes for any family. These are issues that caring, conscious parents should be deciding together with only one goal in mind – the very best interest of their children. Unfortunately, too many parents approach this sensitive subject as adversaries. When child custody becomes a battle, everyone loses. Parents are pitted against each other and innocent children inevitably pay the price. When custodial decisions move into contention, creating a scenario where lawyers, legislation and courts determine the direction of your children’s future, you not only lose power in your life, you lose harmony within your already fragile family structure. The Value

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8 Tips For Co-Parenting Success After Di...

8 Tips For Co-Parenting Success After Divorce
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC  Parenting following a divorce can be complex, frustrating and confusing. However, every day parents around the world are coping with the challenges and raising happy, well-adjusted children. As founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network I’ve found that there are many factors that influence your effectiveness as a co-parent. They begin from the inside out. In this article we’ll review some of the major keys to insuring a more successful co-parenting outcome for you and your children during and long after your divorce. Co-parenting is a life-long endeavor. When you master the skills suggested here, life will be better and more rewarding for everyone in the family. And that’s a goal worth attaining!  1: WATCH YOUR ATTITUDE  Attitude plays a big part in the success of any Child-Centered Divorce. If you approach your divorce with a commitment to making it as positive an experience as possible for

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3 Signs You’re Ready For A Divorce – Esp

3 Signs You’re Ready For A Divorce – Especially If You’re A Parent!
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Divorce catches kids in the middle Is it ever right to consider divorce, especially if you’re a parent? Of course, divorce should be avoided whenever possible. It’s not a solution to marital problems. More like an escape hatch – with no guarantee of a happy ending. If you don’t master the art of fair fighting, using effective communication skills, showing empathy and compassion for the needs of your partner, divorce is not likely to be of value in your life. Chances are you’ll move on to another toxic relationship, bringing with you the same unresolved baggage and issues which are destined to lead to new discord with your new partner. That said, there are sigs that divorce might be the best option for a couple, especially if they are parents. These include: Irreconcilable Disrespect: If one or both partners reach a point

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Is It Parental Conflict – Or Divorce – T

Is It Parental Conflict – Or Divorce – That Most Damages Children?
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Parents Fighting Around Kids After Divorce So often I am asked: Is it divorce or parental discord that most damages children? More and more evidence points at the attitude of the parents being most influential on the outcome for innocent children. Numerous articles by marriage and family therapist Ruth Bettelheim address this topic in ways that are both relevant and, quite surprising for many. That’s because she refutes common misconceptions about divorce and addresses the real issues of concern. According to Bettelheim, “Studies conducted in the past 20 years have shown that on all meaningful measures of success -- social, economic, intellectual and psychological -- most adult children from divorced families are no worse off than their peers whose parents remained married.” Researchers have found two explanations for this, notes Bettelheim. “Children who have to cope with their parents’ separation and post-divorce

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6 Break the Divorce News to the Kids Mes...

6 Break the Divorce News to the Kids Messages for Divorcing Parents
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC The best approach to breaking the divorce news to your children! One of the most difficult conversations any parent will ever have is telling their children about their pending divorce. I know first-hand because many years ago I went through the experience. I fought and faced the overwhelming emotions. The deep gut-wrenching fear. The continuous anxiety. The incredible guilt. And the oppressive weight of shame. My son, after all, was innocent. A sweet, gentle soul who loved his father and mother dearly. He certainly did not deserve this. I struggled with the anxiety for weeks in advance. When should I tell him? How should I tell him? Should we tell him together? And most frightening of all, WHAT SHOULD WE SAY? How do you explain to a child that the life he has known, the comfort he has felt in his family

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